


Flutter

by love_ly_ish



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: (minor) Ladrien, (minor) MariChat, Adrien is depressed, Adrinette, Alya Protection Squad featuring Adrien and Adrien alone, Chloe and Sabrina are my favorite ship fight me, ED Trigger Warning, F/F, F/M, Identity Reveal, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, LadyNoir - Freeform, Marinette Protection Squad featuring Nino and Chloe, Marinette also throws up a lot, Marinette is Angsty, Original Character(s), also Alya goes off the rail, it makes a lot more sense in the story, one permanent death, one temporary death
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2021-01-23
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:27:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 16
Words: 26,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27900748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/love_ly_ish/pseuds/love_ly_ish
Summary: “Well, there’s this really fucking weird stuff that’s been showing up.  This, like, black goo in puddles has been found on ten of the last twelve scenes, and tons more before that,” Alya explained.Marinette felt the blood drain from her face, fingertips and nose going numb.  “What do you think it is?”  The words were as numb as her appendages.“Black goo?” Adrien leaned forward, curiosity sparkling in his emerald eyes.  “Is it...coming from the Akumas?”“I don’t think so,” Alya fed on Adrien’s interest, her hushed tone growing almost feverish.  “It’s mostly human bile, mixed with an unidentifiable substance.  You’ll never guess what it is!”“What?” Adrien asked, his excitement only adding to Marinette’s growing panic.“The DNA all comes from the same person,” Alya’s words turned Marinette’s stomach to cement.  “We have DNA from either Ladybug or Chat Noir.”~AKA — In which the Akuma’s poison is causing troubling effects on Marinette’s health.  Will she be able to fix it before she decomposes?
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Alya Césaire/Nino Lahiffe, Chloé Bourgeois/Sabrina Raincomprix
Comments: 152
Kudos: 206





	1. Black

** Flutter **

  
_Chapter 1_

_Black_

Long, heaving breaths fell from trembling lips as Marinette spat the last of the acidic black liquid into the toilet bowl.With one more hacking breath, she let her head hang into the bright white porcelain, exhaling through her nose and shuddering as droplets of the black fluid flew into the bowl.

Before she had even a moment to clean herself up, the school bell rang overhead, startling her so badly she almost slammed her nose into the toilet seat.“Shit!” Marinette cursed under her breath, grabbing a wad of cheap one-ply toilet paper and hastily dabbing it around her mouth, then under her nose.Shoving the dirtied paper into the right side pocket of her light pink backpack, she shouldered the door open and ran through the sparsely occupied hallway.

“Hi Marinette—!”Blue hair flew by the corner of her vision, though she didn’t stop for the boy calling her name.

“No time, Luka!” she called back, black flats smacking hard against the linoleum as she flew towards her home room.

“See ya, Marinette!” Luka called after her as she rounded the corner, throwing open the first door on her left.Immediately, she regretted her decision to use as much strength as she had; the door handle slammed against the hallway wall, drawing the entire eleventh year class’ attention towards herself.

“Oh, uh...hey?” Marinette asked the statement more than saying it, cheeks reddening as a few chuckles cascaded through the classroom.

“Please, take your seat, Marinette,” Ms. Evelyn offered her a kind smile, nodding towards the empty chair next to Alya in the second row.With a small nod, Marinette made her way to her seat, burying her head in her crossed arms as soon as she sat down.

“Third time this semester?” Alya asked.

“Fourth,” Marinette mummbled into the fabric of her white and pink fuzzy sweater.“And it’s only the second week...”

“You’re lucky Ms. Evelyn likes you.”Alya chuckled lightly, drawing Marinette’s gaze up to her, cheek resting on her right hand.

“You think so?”

“Well, duh!” Alya swatted Marinette’s arm, causing the bluenette to straighten up.“She gives you way more slack than anyone else; it doesn’t take a journalist to figure that out.”

“I guess, but doesn’t she also do that with—“ Marinette began.

“Adrien,” Ms. Evelyn spoke to the blonde boy running into the classroom, shooting him a joking smile.“Looks like Marinette beat you this time around.Better luck next time.”She finished tying her curly black hair into the messy bun she must have started before Adrien showed up.

“I’m sorry Ms. Evelyn, it’s not going to—“ Adrien started, face flushing redder by the moment.

“Just make your way to your seat.I’ll talk to you and Marinette after class today.” She dropped her arms from her hair, folding them in front of her.

Adrien complied wordlessly, smirking at Marinette on his way to his seat.When he was finally seated in front of her, he turned around, catching her gaze.“You too, huh?”

Marinette returned Adrien’s smirk.Two years ago, she would have been a bumbling mess at the thought of talking to him.Nowadays, things weren’t nearly as intense.Sure, she still had feelings for him, but she’d accepted long ago that maintaining her role as Ladybug and a dating life was unmanageable.When she finally got over her feelings and decided to be Adrien’s friend, she found out they actually got along pretty well.

“Yeah, late night.You?” Marinette asked, just hardly loud enough for Adrien to hear her.

“Sure, you could say that.” He blinked glazed eyes at her, yawning and stretching his back as he finished his sentence.He gave her one tiny nod before turning his attention back to Ms. Evelyn.

* * *

“So what is it today, kiddos?” Ms. Evelyn asked, joking gaze passing between Adrien and Marinette.

“I—“

“It was—“

Red faced, the two teens looked at one another.“You first—“ they spoke at once again, shutting their mouths in unison.

“Ok, Adrien, go ahead,” Ms. Evelyn chuckled as she spoke, shaking her head in amusement.

“My, uh, dad had a lot stuff planned for me last night and I, um, didn’t get a lot of sleep,” Adrien’s face reddened once again as he spoke, eyes never leaving his shoes.

“If that’s what you say, then—“ Ms. Evelyn’s tone held an air of playfulness.

“It’s true, ok?” Adrien looked up at the teacher, suddenly defensive.

“Alright, well get going then.No need to be late to your next class, too,” Ms. Evelyn looked right at Adrien as she spoke, making Marinette a bit queasy.She had a feeling her teacher wasn’t about to let her leave with the blond.

“Thank you, ma’am.” Adrien gave a small bow before shooting Marinette a supportive glance.He turned on his heals and left, not daring to shoot another look back.

“Marinette, what’s your excuse today?”Despite the harsh words, Ms. Evelyn somehow managed to retain her cool, joking demeanor.

Marinette’s stomach fell to her feet, face flushing pink before she could try to control it. Since Ms. Evelyn had become their home room teacher a year and a half prior, Marinette had developed a close relationship with her.The late-twenty’s teacher somehow had a broad knowledge of all of her class subjects, and Alya hadn’t exactly been lying about Ms. Evelyn’s favoritism of the young designer, as she often studied with her.After how much time Marinette had spent in her office, the guilt she felt lying to her rivaled how she felt lying to Alya or her parents.

“I wasn’t feeling very well,” it took Ladybug levels of confidence to keep Marinette from stuttering.At least she wasn’t totally lying.

“Oh?What’s the matter?” Ms. Evelyn’s cool exterior crumbled, genuine concern painting her features.

“Nothing too bad,” Marinette blurted, moving her hands in front of her as she spoke.“Just a, uh, stomach ache.”

“Ok, well you keep an eye on it and let myself or the nurse know if it gets any worse.” Ms. Evelyn crossed her arms in front of her, concern still lingering on her features.

“Of course, thank you,” Marinette offered the teacher a small bow before turning towards the door.

“Do you know why I became a teacher?” the elder woman asked, effectively stopping Marinette from leaving the room.

“Uh, why?” Marinette’s posture and gaze crept towards the teacher, fiddling with her chipped nail polish as she watched Ms. Evelyn lean back against her wooden desk.

“Because I believe in youth — in the growth of a new generation.”Her expression fell into one full of wistfulness.“Young people are the future.I’m meant to help you — to guide the future.”

“Oh,” Marinette chuckled, exhaling in a soft puff of air.“I guess I never looked at it that way.”

“Well I have.”In a decisive move, Ms. Evelyn stood up straight, training her gaze on Marinette.“Do you know why I moved to France?To Paris, in particular?”

Marinette would be lying if she said the question hadn’t taken her off guard.She usually forgot that her favorite teacher wasn’t a French native, particularly due to the lack of accent and excess knowledge of the city.She did remember, though, that Ms. Evelyn had some long, foreign-sounding last name, something starting with an ‘L’, maybe?Marinette had thought it sounded pretty, but the young teacher insisted everyone call her Ms. Evelyn — her first name.

“I don’t think you mentioned it,” Marinette shrugged her backpack higher up on her shoulders.

“Think, Marinette.”Ms. Evelyn poked her own temple with a perfectly black painted nail, smiling as she spoke.“You’re a smart girl.What’s your guess?”

Marinette continued to fiddle with her nails, eyes darting between them and her teacher.“Something...um...”

“Think harder,” Ms. Evelyn’s tone took on a harsh edge, causing Marinette to train her vision on her.“What makes Paris different than any other city?”

A chill ran down Marinette’s spine, the answer spontaneously on the tip of her tongue.“Chat Noir.And Ladybug.”

Ms. Evelyn nodded, leaning back against her desk once again.“Different order than I would have chosen, but yes.The voices of the blossoming generation.I just couldn’t stay away.”

“You really think they’re that great?” Marinette’s voice was quiet as she spoke, her own insecurities bubbling beneath her hushed tone.

“You don’t?”There was something there in the teacher’s voice — something that made Marinette’s stomach churn more than it already was.Ms. Evelyn opened her mouth to speak again, but whatever she was about to say was covered by the sound of the final bell for next period.“Well, shoot,” her voice was a bit too smooth as she spoke, “looks like you’re late.Let me write you a note, Marinette.”

“Thank you, Ms. Evelyn.”

* * *

“So what did Ev keep you for?” Nino pulled Alya closer towards him as he spoke to Marinette, who was sitting on the ground across from the happy couple, the smell of fresh cut grass tickling her nose.

“Ms. Evelyn just wanted to know why I was late again,” Marinette grappled with her nose, rubbing it and sniffling before taking a bite of her apple.

“Yeah, but you were late to maths.Everything ok?” Nino asked, smiling at his girlfriend as she nuzzled into his side.

“Yeah, it’s cool,” Marinette stifled a sneeze before taking another tentative bite.“I mean, it’s Ms. Evelyn.She’s cool.”

“I told you she’s soft on you,” Alya chuckled as she spoke, popping a granola cluster into her mouth.

“Well, I wasn’t arguing with you.”Marinette shrugged before taking the last bite of her apple.“Adrien got off without detention too, you know.”

“Yeah, and I was super lucky,” Adrien said from behind Marinette, eliciting a small squeak as she jumped a bit.“Oh, sorry, didn’t mean to scare you, Marinette.”

“It’s fine.”Marinette waved a hand in front of her as Adrien took a seat between herself and Nino, setting his lunch down in front of him.“We were just talking about how Ms. Evelyn has a soft spot for you and I.”

“Really?” Adrien asked, looking between his best friend and Marinette.“Are you sure?”

“Dude, you really are oblivious,” Nino laughed.“She’s let the two of you off with a warning so many times, you’d both probably be suspended or something if she actually documented it.”

“Yeah, you two seem to run about fifteen minutes later than the rest of us,” Alya chimed in before scooping some mango yogurt into her mouth.

“I’m just really busy—“

“You know I can be kinda—“

Adrien and Marinette turned to one another, their overlapping sentences coming to a halt.

“Yeah, whatever, old news,” Alya straightened up under her boyfriend’s arm as she spoke.“You wanna know some _real_ news?”

Marinette immediately felt anxiety creep into her throat; Alya only ever got this excited over things related to Ladybug or the LadyBlog.Despite her growing panic, she swallowed hard, forcing a tight smile.“What is it?” her voice felt taught as she spoke.

“Well, obviously I can trust you guys, but don’t say anything — I’ve been waiting to write this article until I have enough solid evidence,” Alya began to explain, only hardening the growing pit in Marinette’s stomach.“I sort of have a theory I’ve been working on.You know how the mayor passed that law a year ago about every Akuma crime scene being swept?”

“Sure.”Of course Marinette remembered — it was the reason finding a place to detransform had become so difficult.

“Well, the reports were made public about a month ago, and, get this,” Alya lowered her tone as she spoke, leaning in closer to her friends.“Well, there’s this really _fucking_ weird stuff that’s been showing up.This, like, black goo in puddles has been found on ten of the last twelve scenes, and tons more before that.Scientists have studied it, but they refuse to make their analysis public.”

Marinette felt the blood drain from her face, fingertips and nose going numb.“What do you think it is?”The words were as numb as her appendages.

“Well, I found some two weeks ago, and had Ivan take a look at it,” Alya explained.Ivan had expanded his interest in chemistry, learning on the college level thanks to a post secondary program at their school.“I didn’t want to say anything in case it was a bust, but he gave me the results today, and oh boy, you’ll never guess what it is.”

“Black goo?” Adrien leaned forward, curiosity sparkling in his emerald eyes.“Is it...coming from the Akumas?”

“I don’t think so,” Alya fed on Adrien’s interest, her hushed tone growing almost feverish.“It’s mostly human bile, mixed with an unidentifiable substance.Bless Ivan’s soul, he knew I’d want more information, and oh _wow_ did he provide!”

“What?” Adrien asked, his excitement only adding to Marinette’s growing panic.

“The DNA all comes from the same person,” Alya’s words turned Marinette’s stomach to cement.“We have DNA from either Ladybug or Chat Noir.”


	2. Decompose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We see what Chat thinks, and get a little insight on what’s going on

**Flutter**

_Chapter 2_

_Decompose_

Patrol that night began at a sluggish pace, the polar opposite of the last few nights. While the Akuma attacks had started off few and far between, they'd grown more frequent over the years. Marinette's guess was that Hawk Moth was growing impatient, and Chat seemed to agree when she'd brought it up. Now there were a few attacks a week, the current week being especially bad. The last three nights in a row, there had been an Akuma attack right as the heroic duo began patrol, as if Hawk Moth was anticipating their schedule. That night, however, Marinette — or, at the moment, Ladybug — managed to go two hours before even hearing from Chat, let alone battling an Akuma.

"Bugaboo, can we talk at the end of patrol tonight?" Chat's voice almost sounded concerned, which Ladybug was able to pick up on even from the other end of the phone.

"Yeah, sure. Everything ok?"

"Um, yeah," he didn't sound quite sure. "Just wanted to ask you about something."

"Sure, let's see if an Akuma beats you to the punch, though."

"Ugh, don't jinx it. See ya, M'Lady." With that, Chat hung up, leaving Ladybug smirking and shaking her head down at her phone. Taking a deep breath, she closed her yo-yo, using it to swing down a few more alleyways. Along with stopping Akumas, Ladybug and Chat Noir had taken to stopping petty crimes as well. That meant they had to expand their patrol routes, but it was well worth the hassle to help people in need.

Something caught her eye in one alleyway, causing the black-spotted heroine to land on the ground, suit-covered feet flexing against the cracked tarmac. Looking around the trashed corridor, she didn't see anything out of the ordinary, though she could have sworn she'd seen a faint purple light from above.

"Hello? Is anyone back here?" Ladybug called out, her slow footsteps scratching pieces of gravel against the ground. A low grumbling noise from behind a dumpster on her right stopped her in her tracks, heart beginning to race. "It's me, Ladybug. You don't have anything to worry about."

"But _you_ do," a deep voice echoed in the tight space, sending a tingle down her spine. She recognized the voice immediately — one she'd heard more and more as the Akuma attacks grew more frequent. After all, the devil had been taking more control lately.

"Hawk Moth," Ladybug growled, instinctively pressing the call button on her yo-yo.

"Let me guess," the purple glow slowly crept up the walls of the alleyway as the villain's voice licked the inside of Ladybug's ears. "You've already alerted your little sidekick."

"Wow, you can recognize a pattern," Ladybug snorted, voice dripping in sarcasm in an attempt to cover up the unease. "Impressive."

"All you have to do is give me your Miraculous," Hawk Moth's voice rang inside her ears, "and this will all be over."

Cockroaches began crawling out from the back of the dumpster — hundreds of tiny, shiny purple-black bugs manifesting in front of Ladybug in the form of a little boy. He tilted his head to the left, featureless face crawling with the slimy bugs.

"That's all you want, isn't it?" the voice was almost deafening against her ears now, causing Ladybug to grit her teeth. "For all of this to be over."

"Save it, bug-face," Chat's voice came from above the alley — looking up confirmed he was crouched on a fire escape a few stories up. The roaches hissed in response, hundreds of spitting creatures beginning to disperse into a cloud of flying bugs.

"Give me your Miraculous if you want this to stop," the bugs hissed it this time, an almost seductive approach in comparison to the pounding roar from before.

"Like that's gonna happen," Chat retorted, using his baton to glide down to Ladybug's side. "Told you you jinxed us."

"Not now, Chat," Ladybug's attention hardly left the Akuma while she spoke, eyes straining to catch a glimpse of any sort of affected item.

"You're the boss, M'Lady."

Chat deepened his fighting stance, giving Ladybug a small elbow nudge — a part of the code they'd come up with — before charging the Akuma. He swept his baton through the now cloudy figure, causing the buzzing, flying bugs to disperse for half a second. Ladybug managed to catch a glimpse of the affected item — a fist-sized scarab figurine. She shot Chat a decisive nod, signaling for a retreat. He pulled himself up with his baton, Ladybug following with her yo-yo.

"What's the plan?" Chat asked in a hushed tone.

"Try a cataclysm on the bugs. If it works, I can grab the scarab. If it doesn't, he'll be distracted and scattered long enough for me to grab it. I just need to be close enough, hmm..."

Ladybug looked at Chat, smirking before pulling herself to her feet on the rooftop. She called out for her lucky charm, red and black spotted duct tape falling into her hands. She glanced down at the swarm of bugs, a plan falling into her mind.

"I've got it. Let's go," Ladybug told Chat, finishing her preparations and leaping down to ground level again.

"I'm sure you have a plan," the bugs hissed, swarm growing quickly into a frenzy. "I'm sure you'll win. But how much longer, Ladybug?"

"I'm not letting you win," Ladybug spat, spinning her yo-yo in front of her.

"I've read the reports," the Akuma mocked her, a few cockroaches brushing against her ear as he spoke in scattered hisses. "I know you're _decomposing_."

Ladybug faltered, yo-yo slowing for a few seconds before she managed to regain her composure. Before she could think of what to say, Chat flew down from above with his cataclysm, successfully disintegrating most of the bugs. In a quick move, Ladybug whipped her yo-yo towards the gaping hole in the swarm, grabbing the shiny plastic scarab toy with the piece of duct tape she'd stuck to the end.

The moment the fight was over, instinct took over; Ladybug purified the Akuma, fixed the damage, helped the little boy who'd been Akumatized find his mother, and managed to dodge the press. By the time it was all over, she'd somehow outlasted both her warning beeps and her growing nausea. In the rush of it all, Chat managed to catch her long enough to whisper "The Louvre", which is where she ended up after she finished dealing with the Akuma and fed Tikki.

"Long night, huh?" Chat asked from his sitting position on the edge of the roof, legs dangling. His eyes immediately caught her's, silently inviting her to come sit.

"I guess. Especially after the attack this morning," Ladybug sat down next to her partner as she spoke. Upon sitting down, her growing nausea fell away a bit, though it still lingered in the pit of her stomach.

"Yeah. It must be, uh, hard on you, right?" Chat asked, avoiding Ladybug's questioning gaze.

"Kinda. I don't know, what do you mean?" Ladybug's stomach jumped at the thought that Chat might know about the Akuma's recent side effect on her.

"Oh, I, um...just noticed something the other day. Like this, uh, black bile...stuff?" Chat stammered, eyes still locked on his fiddling hands in his lap.

"Oh," Ladybug managed, stomach churning angrily with anxiety. "Weird. What do you think it could be?"

"Ladybug," the use of her entire pseudonym rattled her bones, "you know you can tell me anything, right?"

At that moment, Ladybug's stomach gave an agitated growl at the same time her first warning beep rang out, hot saliva flooding her mouth. A gloved hand shot to her lips, trying to keep the contents of her stomach from spilling. Her body lurched, the urge to vomit overtaking her senses as she turned to her left, away from Chat, and threw up.

"Lady, oh, jeez." Chat's comforting hand came to rest on her back, rubbing warm, soothing circles. "It's ok. Let it out."

As he spoke, Ladybug let the black acid fall out of her, puddling on the rooftop in front of her. With one final lurch, the nausea came to a stop, along with the vomit.

"Sorry," Ladybug spat the words along with a few black droplets. She pulled shaking hands to her face, desperately wiping the black substance from her nose and mouth. "Shit, I'm so sorry Chat, usually I can hold it—"

"Shh, no, don't apologize." Chat turned Ladybug towards himself, enveloping her in a tight hug. "Are you ok?"

It took a few seconds for the shock to wear off and for Ladybug to return the embrace, entire body shaking as she did so. "I...I don't know. I don't know what's happening to me, Chat."

"It'll be ok," Chat's breath brushed against her ear. "I'm here, and I'll protect you, ok? Just like always. I'll protect you, Ladybug."

Ladybug wanted to believe him, but how could she? Sure, Chat could push her away from an attack, or pull her from harms way, but how could he fix this? Considering Master Fu had passed a year and a half prior, the book and remaining Miraculous' disappearing with his life, the two of them had the most knowledge about the Miraculous in the world. If she didn't have an answer, how could Chat?

Nonetheless, Ladybug let herself melt into her partner's embrace. He might not be able to fix her, but he did know how to calm her down. "Thank you, Chat."

"Anytime. Every time." Chat squeezed her a bit tighter at that, hands still drawing circles against her shivering back.

* * *

"Tikki," Marinette set her work in progress aside, careful to slide the needle into the mock tomato on her desk. "I have a question for you."

Tiki slumped forward from her place on Marinette's pillow, slowly hefting a lazy yawn. Two Akuma attacks in a day had to be hard on the magical creature. "Yes, Marinette?"

"How do I stop throwing up after I purify an Akuma?" Marinette's tone was soft as she asked, causing the Kwami's features to scrunch up in confusion.

"What was that? I didn't hear you," Tiki explained as she floated up and towards Marinette.

"I...how do I make it stop? The throwing up..." Marinette looked down at her work, absently fiddling with the fabric. "It's happens every time I purify an Akuma and...you have to know, but you haven't...we haven't talked about it. Like, at all."

Tikki sighed from her spot in the air next to her, floating down and landing on Marinette's shoulder. The teen turned towards her, tears glittering over her eyelashes.

"I'm sorry, Marinette," Tikki began, placing a small hand on her cheek. "When it started a month ago...well, how do I explain this. It might actually be a good thing."

Marinette tilted her head away from her Kwami, furrowing her brows a bit. "What do you mean?"

"I...oh, I should have told you ages ago, but I thought that..." Tikki turned away from Marinette, sniffling softly. "This isn't the first time I've seen side effects like this from a Ladybug."

"It isn't?" Marinette acquiesced, tone almost doll-like from her confusion.

"No," Tikki turned back to her, "it isn't. Marinette, the Ladybug Miraculous isn't exactly _made_ to purify Akumas. It's one of its many abilities, but it is one that is meant to be used sparingly. When it's used consistently, and as often as you use it..." Tikki gazed into Marinette's eyes as she took a deep breath. "It can be dangerous."

"Dangerous how?" Marinette asked, eyes wide as saucers as she looked at the back of her Kwami.

"It...doesn't matter," Tikki turned back around as she spoke, a dainty smile plastered on her face. "Because your body is rejecting the poison."

"Poison?" Marinette choked on the word, head turning away from Tikki as she cleared her throat.

"It's ok though!" Tikki flew to Marinette's other side, catching her teary eyes. "It's not like it's been coming out any other way. The best way to remove the Akuma's residue is by purging, specifically throwing up. I was actually more worried before it started happening...but Marinette, your body is doing exactly what it needs to do."

That seemed to jolt Marinette out of her shocked state a bit. "Oh. Ok. So as long as that black stuff is only coming out..."

"...when you throw up, yes."

"...then I'll be ok?"

Tikki placed a comforting hand on Marinette's cheek. "Exactly. Now, come to bed. It's been a long day, it's late, and you don't need another tardy."

"Sure, Tikki," Marinette patted her Kwami on the head, watching her nuzzle just a bit. "Let me just wash up, then I'll go to bed."

Tikki nodded, flying back over to the little pillow Marinette had set out on her nightstand. Marinette walked over to the bathroom, going through her entire ten step Korean skincare regimen — a habit Alya had convinced her to try that stuck. She finished her nightly routine by brushing her teeth, giving herself a hard look in the mirror when she was finished.

"You're fine," she tried to convince herself, plastering a confident look on her face. "This is a good thing. Tikki told me I have nothing to worry..."

Marinette trailed off, smile fading as she watched black ooze dribble out of her right nostril, sliding down to her lip in just a moment. With shaking hands, she swatted the fluid away, gasping in a sharp breath when it smeared, inky black swiping across her right cheek.

"Well shit."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! I know I just posted the first chapter yesterday, but because I’ve been able to write two additional chapters in the last two days, I decided to post this chapter and the next — just to get a decent amount of content out there right away.
> 
> That being said, thank you all so so much for the immediate support and feedback!! I’ve been trying to respond to all reviews, because they honestly mean the world to me :) so thank you all!
> 
> From here on out, I’ll be updating every Tuesday and Saturday, so stay tuned!
> 
> Until next time (Aka within the next few minutes),
> 
> ~Ashtyn


	3. Tears

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Welp, here you go! Stay tuned for the next chapter on Tuesday :)

**Flutter**

_Chapter 3_

_Tears_

"Psst, Mari," Alya nudged Marinette awake, voice a hushed whisper. The bluenette grimaced at her, pulling herself up from her previously slumped position. "Class is over, time to get up."

Marinette nodded, looking around her at the desolate classroom, just a few other students lingering before lunch. "Thanks. Did she—"

"Yeah, she saw you, but she didn't say anything. Marinette, you look really..." Alya pondered her next words, a soft breath falling from pensive lips. "Are you ok? You seem more tired than usual."

Alya was right, of course. After her little "nosebleed" the night prior, Marinette had hardly slept at all, tossing and turning at the revelation. She hadn't been able to bring herself to tell Tikki, but she'd promised she would soon enough. She just needed time to process it first, that was all.

"I'm fine," Marinette lied, shoving her books into her backpack and hauling herself to her feet. "Let's eat, yeah?"

Alya got up slowly, expression taught with concern. "Ok. You sure you don't want to take a nap or something instead?"

Right on cue, Marinette's stomach growled, causing the teens to turn to one another, stifling laughs. "I kinda, uh, overslept and missed breakfast."

"Obviously." Alya's tone was still tight, though she played along with Marinette. "Let's get you some food."

The two walked out of the classroom, chattering about where they were going to go to eat. "We could always go to the bakery," Marinette suggested, smiling when Alya's face lit up.

"Oh, yes! Please? We can make a whole thing out of it — invite the boys and have those mini pizza macaroons your dad makes?" Alya's tone was pleading, her demeanor growing more excited with each word.

"Sure," Marinette chuckled, "go ahead and text them to meet us there."

"On it," Alya clicked a few buttons on her phone as she talked, still managing to keep up with Marinette.

* * *

"And so I said to him—" Adrien boasted, swallowing another bite of one of the sandwiches Marinette's mom had made for the teens.

"And by him, you mean one of the most prestigious modernist designers in the world?" Marinette gazed at him with a dropped jaw, chuckling a bit. "Unreal."

"Yes, him as in the best modernist or whatever," Adrien continued, talking with his hands — and sandwich. "I told him where he can shove his stupid hat."

"And where would that be?" Marinette's mom asked from behind the teen, making him jump.

"Oh, uh, nowhere! Thank you for the lovely sandwiches, Mrs. Dupain-Cheng," Adrien stammered, face going red.

"Uh-huh. You're very welcome, Adrien," the elder Dupain-Cheng snorted sarcastically, grabbing some of the trash on the table before returning to the bakery counter.

"Dude," Nino chuckled, smiling at his best friend, "you totally pissed Mari's mom of!"

"I did not!" Adrien gaped, eliciting laughs from the other three teens. "Ugh...did I?"

"No, Adrien, you're fine," Marinette laughed it off, bumping his shoulder with her own from her seat next to him. "My mom likes you just fine, and she's heard me say way worse."

"Good," relief flooded his voice. Taking a moment, he turned to Nino and Alya, who were still stifling laughs. "You guys are _so_ not funny."

"I beg to differ," Nino replied.

"And I second!" Alya pecked Nino on the cheek.

Marinette laughed a little at the scene, taking another bite of her sandwich. Her stomach grumbled dangerously as she chewed, urging her to set down the food on the little plate she had in front of her.

"You ok, Marinette?" Alya asked, drawing Marinette's attention back to the group.

"Oh, yeah! Why?"

"Well, we were just talking about the LadyBlog, but you seemed a little spacey, so...?" Alya trailed off, causing Marinette's gaze to travel down to her lap. Before she could answer, her stomach flipped again, bringing a rancid belch to her throat, which she hid nauseously.

"Marinette?" Adrien asked, tone soft enough to bring her eyes to his. "Is everything ok?"

"I just have to use the restroom," Marinette explained, getting up too fast for her stomach's liking. Before her friends could question her further, she bolted down the hall, slamming the door and kneeling before the toilet.

"Shit...shit! Fuck this," Marinette moaned, clutching her stomach as it lurched angrily. She pushed the seat up, hanging her head in defeat. "Just get it over with already..."

Marinette sat there for ten seconds. Then thirty. Then a minute, maybe two. Nothing came up, her chest heaving in discomfort all the while. She whined in desperation, dry heaving for a few more moments before falling to her side on the ground, hugging her knees to her chest in the fetal position.

"Tikki..." Marinette looked around the bathroom, letting out a sob when she realized she'd left the table without taking her Kwami with her. As soon as her first tears fell, they kept falling relentlessly, stinging her eyes angrily as she shook. It took her too long to compose herself, but just as she stood on shaking legs, there was a gentle rap at the door.

"Marinette?" Adrien's voice rang through the bathroom, concern coloring his tone. "Are you ok?"

Marinette opened the door in hopes of finding some sort of comfort in her friend. As soon as he saw her, his expression softened.

"You've been crying?" Adrien asked lowly.

"I...how can you tell?" Marinette half joked, wiping her running nose.

"Well, your makeup is kind of all over your face, so..." Adrien played along with her, laughing lightly.

"I..." Marinette stiffened. She hadn't done her makeup that morning — she'd already been so late to class. Before she could stop to think, she spun around to look at herself in the mirror, gasping when she saw the inky black trails running from her eyes. Touching the fluid with her right index finger and pulling it to her nose, she grimaced at the all too familiar acidic scent.

"It really doesn't look that bad. I can help you clean up if you want," Adrien reassured her from the door, mistaking her worry for some sort of vanity.

"I can do it," Marinette's voice shuddered with each syllable. "Just...give me a few minutes."

* * *

The rest of the day dragged on far longer than Marinette had hoped it would, her stomach churning all the while. By the time the final bell for the day rang, her head was spinning and pounding, her thoughts sluggish and erratic.

"Are you sure you're ok?" Alya asked gently as they walked out of school. Marinette looked at her best friend, blinking lazily before nodding.

"Yeah. I just need to lay down, I think," Marinette shrugged as she spoke, shoulders hardly moving due to her exhaustion.

"Ok, well you let me know what I can do, ok?" Alya asked, concern swimming in her hazel eyes.

"I will," Marinette sighed, looking at her friend's critical expression. "I promise, ok?"

"Yeah...I'll see you tomorrow, Mari."

Marinette turned and walked away, not sparing a look back at her best friend. She was having a hard time keeping up the facade of being even remotely ok, and she knew that one more look behind her could jeopardize that. It took her far too long to get home, though her parents didn't notice due to the after work/school rush, which made it easier to sneak to her room unnoticed. Usually when her parents were slammed, she stopped by to help. Maybe they wouldn't notice she'd skipped out today.

Marinette sat, shaking, on her bed. Her passing thoughts skidded to a halt when Tikki flew from her bag, floating just a few inches from her face.

"Tikki!" Marinette jumped back, causing a grimace to fall to her features as a jolt of pain flooded her senses for a moment.

"What's going on, Marinette?"

"Nothing, I just don't feel—"

"Not this again," Tiki rubbed her own face with tiny hands as she spoke, her head shaking all the while.

"What?" Marinette snapped, startling her Kwami. A knot of tension and frustration knotted itself in her chest, easing the flaring pain.

"I'm just worried about you." Tikki flew closer, resting a single hand on Marinette's face. "What's going on? You don't have to hide this from me."

"I—" the sudden anger in Marinette's fizzled, leaving her breathless and in pain once more. "I don't know."

"You're not able to throw up the Akuma's poison, are you?" Tikki asked gently, cooing when Marinette started to cry. "Hey, it's ok. We'll figure this out?"

"How?" Marinette asked gently, wiping her eyes and humming sadly when her fingers came back black. "Master Fu and the Miraculous books disappeared a year and a half ago."

"We'll find a way," Tikki promised. "I swear we will."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all! What do you think?
> 
> I wrote a pretty comprehensive a/n last chapter, so take a look at that if you haven’t already. I hope everyone enjoys this chapter!
> 
> Until next time,
> 
> ~Ashtyn


	4. Normal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We get some more Chat / Ladybug interactions, with a little cliffhanger at the end ;)

**Flutter**

_Chapter 4_

_Normal_

"Marinette, could I have a word?" Ms. Evelyn's voice caused the teen to turn away from her friends, looking behind her as she stopped near the classroom door.

"Sure," she answered, turning to Alya, Nino, and Adrien, who had stopped when their home room teacher had called her name. "Go ahead, I'll catch up."

The three nodded before turning towards the door and walking out, continuing on with their previous conversation about the mysterious black bile. The story had blown up in the last day in the news, only adding to Marinette's growing unease.

"Yes, Ms. Evelyn?" Marinette asked, taking a step towards her teacher in the now-empty classroom.

"I just wanted to check in on you is all," Ms. Evelyn's tone took on a worried quality as she leaned against the front of her desk. "I know you hadn't been feeling well. How are you doing today?"

Marinette stiffened, forcing herself to relax for the sake of her teacher's worried state. "I'm doing much better," she lied, voice small and gentle. "I really think it was just a little stomach bug."

Ms. Evelyn pursed her lips, a strand of curly black hair falling from behind her ear as she shifted. "You're telling me the truth? Or are you trying to keep me from worrying."

Marinette's lower lip shook, her breath rattling in her ever-aching chest. Since she'd begun crying the black sludge two days prior, her body had grown weaker and more sore by the hour. She'd managed to keep up a facade of strength around her friends, but something about Ms. Evelyn's stare shattered everything she'd worked so hard to maintain.

"I—" the floodgates broke as soon as Marinette opened her mouth to speak, a shuddering sob falling from trembling lips. Faster than she thought possible, Marinette was wrapped in Ms. Evelyn's tight embrace, one hand resting on the back of her head, the other rubbing slow circles in her back.

"Shh. It's ok. Just let it out."

"I don't know what's happening to me," Marinette told her through her sobs. "I'm sick and I hurt and I don't know what to do."

"It's ok. You're ok. You can tell me anything," Ms. Evelyn whispered into Marinette's ear. Her voice was so gentle and caring, it made Marinette want to tell her everything — about the bile and the nosebleed and tears and about Ladybug. Her earlobes stung at the thought, her Miraculous roping her impulsive thoughts back in.

"I'm just..." Marinette struggled to form her next sentence, mind foggy and body aching. "I want to feel normal again."

"And what does normal look like?" Ms. Evelyn asked, her question grinding against Marinette's growing anxiety.

"I don't know anymore," the teen lamented, her sobs falling into Ms. Evelyn's hair. "I... _I'm_ not normal."

Ms. Evelyn pulled Marinette away from her a bit, both hands coming to rest on either of her shoulders. "And what does that mean, hun?"

Again, Marinette almost blurted her secrets right then, though she swallowed the urge with a small gulp. "I have to get to class."

Ms. Evelyn's expression twisted into one of concern, her brows furrowing. "Marinette."

The teenager pulled away, wiping her eyes and relaxing a bit when they came back clear. "I'll see you on Monday, Ms. Evelyn."

Before the teacher could say another word, Marinette was out the door, wiping the tears and snot from her face.

* * *

"What's up, bugaboo?" Chat descended next to Ladybug, causing her to flinch away.

She caught her balance, steadying herself atop the Louve carefully. "Dick," she muttered, slapping his arm playfully and watching her partner's face split into a grin.

"You are what you eat," Chat wiggled his eyebrows at her jokingly. Ladybug stared at him for a few seconds, waiting for him to realize his mistake. After a few moments, his face fell into a scowl. "Wait, no, I don't mean me, I meant you—"

"Too late, kitty cat," Ladybug told him in a singsong voice. "You are what you eat."

"Look, Lady, I'm _not_ gay," Chat accentuated his point with a firm clap, causing Ladybug to smirk.

"Hmm...bi? Pan, maybe?" she teased.

"I'm not—" Chat's cheeks were pink at this point.

"What, are you _offended_?" Ladybug nudged him playfully, watching his blush deepen. "You're no homophobe, are you?"

"I— you— I don't— _Ladybug_!" Chat whined, stomping his foot as his ears laid flat, tail whipping in frustration. "You're impossible."

"I learned from the best," Ladybug turned away with a smirk, using her yo-yo to swing across the city. She didn't have to look back to know her partner was following her, her body instinctively taking her to the Eiffel Tower.

Upon landing on one of the upper levels, she steadied herself on one of the beams, smiling as she watched Chat trying to catch up. A few moments later, he was next to her, huffing as he put his baton away.

"Took ya long enough," Ladybug smiled at him, hiding a wince when her hand brushed against a sore spot on her ribs as she crossed her arms.

"Well, you didn't exactly give me much of a warning," Chat grumbled, poking her on the nose. "Next time, at least tell me what you're doing."

"And where would the fun in that be?" Ladybug ruffled his hair, causing the other hero to smirk at her.

"Ok, you wanna go, buggie?" Chat joked, assuming a fighting position on the beam. "Let's go."

"Not today, kitty." Ladybug turned away slightly, sighing and wincing as the sudden loss of breath sent a pain through her chest. This time, Chat noticed, his fighting stance falling as he took two small steps towards her.

"What's the matter? There hasn't been an Akuma in four days," Chat asked, his voice taught with worry. "Is it the—"

"Yeah," Ladybug wheezed out, her playful facade fully dropping now, "it is."

Chat's arms were on her's in a second, his fingers gripping her elbows lightly as he turned her towards himself. "What's going on? Have you talked to your Kwami?"

Ladybug nodded rapidly, tears collecting in her eyes. "Sh- she told me that it-it was a side effect of purifying the Akumas. A- and it's getting worse."

Chat stiffened, his tail whipping angrily behind him now. "You're not purifying another Akuma. Not until we figure this out."

Ladybug looked at him, letting out a scornful laugh. "You can't be serious."

"I'm dead serious."

"That's not going to happen, Chat," Ladybug tried to pull her arms away, but Chat's grasp was firm, and she felt too weak to tug any harder.

"Like hell it's not!" he snapped, causing Ladybug to flinch back. Immediately, his face fell into concern, his head lowered a bit.

"I'm sorry — I didn't mean to get mad, I just..." he met her eyes again, expression pleading. "Please. I can't watch you...watch you..."

" _Decompose_?" Ladybug repeated Hawkmoth's words, causing her partner to shudder.

"Never. You can't do this to yourself."

"I have to."

"No you—"

"Chat!" Ladybug threw her hands in the air, her voice echoing off the steel beams. "You know I can't stop! You saw what happens if I don't follow through!"

Chat opened his mouth before closing it, his eyes clouding over as he pondered a thought. "We could trap them."

"Chat."

"Hold them for a while."

"Please."

"I- I can keep them in my room. Away from you. Away from everyone."

"You can't," Ladybug pleaded, finally catching Chat's attention again. "What if they get out? You'll be Akumatized."

"I won't, I'll be careful—"

"No," Ladybug whispered it this time, taking a few steps towards him. "Don't. I can handle this. We just- just have to catch Hawkmoth soon. That's all."

Chat looked like he wanted to argue, but knew better. After all, Ladybug was notoriously stubborn, especially when it came to her city's wellbeing. "Ok. Then we will. We'll defeat him as soon as possible, and then we can get back to normal."

The word 'normal' bounced around inside Ladybug's head, her thoughts drifting to Ms. Evelyn's question earlier that day. _What does normal look like?_ She still didn't know the answer.

* * *

Of course there was an Akuma that night. Of _course_ there was. It was minor — nothing the duo couldn't handle, especially with the Ladybug suit lending Marinette its strength. But by the time she had to detransform, it was a different story.

Ladybug landed gently in an alleyway, the setting sun painting long shadows on the cracked pavement. She'd managed to convince Chat not to follow her, despite his pleading words to let him help. It was when she mentioned the danger in knowing one another's identities that he finally relented, soaring above Paris in the opposite direction of her.

Now, Marinette stood in the empty alleyway, panting heavily as stars fluttered in and out of her vision. Tikki drifted sleepily into her purse without a word, probably just as physically exhausted as she felt. Staggering out of the alleyway, the black spots in her vision widened, the acidic bile snaking up her throat.

"No..." she moaned, somebody's worried chattering lingering in the background of her senses. "Go away, I—"

Before Marinette could find a private spot, the bile began dribbling from the corner of her lips, stinging her mouth and the skin around it. She fell to her knees with a sickening _thunk_ , someone's hands coming behind her neck to grab stray strands of hair. She cursed herself mentally, wanting desperately to flee from whoever was near her, but her body had a different idea. The bile spewed from her mouth, sizzling lightly on the ground below her as she heaved forcefully. After what felt like hours, the vomit finally ceased, leaving Marinette with clouded vision and burning lips. Wiping at her skin in agitation, she blinked the clouds and spots from her vision before turning around.

"You..." his voice fluttered almost as much as Marinette's stomach, her chest filling with tight anxiety. He knew. He _had_ to. She could tell by the way he looked down at the black puddle and up to her again.

"Please—" Marinette began to plead, but it was too late. He knew, and there was nothing she could do about it.

"Marinette...you're _Ladybug_ ," Nino said, his face swimming in shock.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all! What do you think?
> 
> I just wanted to say how incredibly grateful I've been for the reception this story is getting! I've been trying to reply to ever comment, because they honestly mean so much, and it's such a serotonin boost, so thank you :,)
> 
> I'm doing ok, thank you to those of you who have wished me well! I'm very lucky that I haven't been personally effected by COVID, though I know a lot of you out there have been, so please stay safe!
> 
> I'll continue posting every Tuesday and Saturday, most likely in the mornings, though the times may vary.
> 
> Until next time,
> 
> ~Ashtyn


	5. Sweat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's see how Nino reacts, shall we?

**Flutter**

_Chapter 5_

_Sweat_

Nino shouldered the door to the Dupain-Cheng bakery open, having retrieved the keys from Marinette's purse. He moved carefully, carrying her bridal style into the bakery and sighing in relief upon realizing Marinette's parents weren't downstairs.

"Are they usually asleep at this time?" Nino's voice was tight as he shifted Marinette in his arms, earning a sharp gasp.

"Yes! Just get me to my room," she hissed through the pain, face scrunched up too tightly to unwind.

"Ok. Ok." Marinette could feel Nino walking as he spoke. "It'll be ok. Just hold on."

Marinette hummed in agreement, nuzzling her face into his chest as he sped up the stairs. She heard him curse when he saw the ladder up to her room, though he somehow managed to walk them both up. Before she had a chance to open her eyes, Nino had set her down on her bed, taking a step back and giving her space.

"What do you need?" he asked in a whisper.

"Tikki..." Marinette mumbled, cracking her eyes open to peer at Nino. He tilted his head in question, body still stiff. "My purse," she wheezed in response. "Put cookies in my purse."

Nino furrowed his brow, though he did as he was told, grabbing a few loose mini-cookies from Marinette's nightstand and rushing over to her purse, which he must have set on her desk. Upon opening it, he yelped, dropping the cookies and purse and jumping back.

"I- I didn't notice that before! What is it?"

"Tikki," Marinette closed her eyes tightly as she hissed the words out. "She needs food."

By the time she opened her eyes again, Nino was crouched down by her side, brushing the loose strands of hair from her face.

"Hey, Mari, stay with me, ok?" he cooed. "What can I do?"

Marinette panted lightly, wiping sweat from her forehead and cringing when it came back as a dark grey sheen. "I need to get it off me."

"What?"

Marinette's gaze snapped to Nino's. "It's leaking through my skin, and it's acidic. It's getting worse. I need to get it _off_."

That sobered Nino up, his arms coming under her shoulders and knees. "How are we going to—"

"Just get me in the tub, I'll be ok," Marinette wheezed, her skin — especially where she was sweating the most — stinging wildly. "I- I can take it from there."

"Are you sure?" Nino asked as he pushed the door open to Marinette's tiny bathroom, the tub tucked away in the corner.

"Yes, just hurry!" she hissed, clasping her hands tightly around Nino's neck as she shuddered violently.

Nino let her down, supporting her under her right arm as she somehow managed to stand. "Do you— can you take off your—?"

"Help me out of them," Marinette answered, seething and writhing in horrible, burning pain. "If I can- can just get in my underwear, I'll be ok."

Nino did as he was told, carefully helping her out of her white turtleneck and light pink skinny jeans. He helped lower her into the tub, turning on the water and sighing in relief when Marinette did the same.

"Are..." Nino blushed as his gaze flew over her body, refocusing on her eyes. "Are you going to be ok?"

Marinette pulled the swelling water over her skin, the stinging pain easing immediately. "Yes," her voice was soft and tired as her eyelids drifted to a half-lidded state. "Yes, I'm ok. Thank you."

Nino nodded, turning and hurrying out of the door before turning over his shoulder. "I'll be out here if you need me, ok?"

Marinette relaxed into the tub, closing her eyes completely and humming in response. She heard Nino close the door, letting the rest of the tension fall from her aching body.

* * *

By the time Marinette's aches and pains finally ceased, the water had turned hardly lukewarm. She was able to pull herself up without too much effort, patting herself dry and grabbing new undergarments and clothes from a stack of clean clothes she kept in one of her cabinets. She took the time to brush her hair and teeth, complete her skincare routine, and even lather herself in a thin coat of shea butter.

Upon walking out her bathroom, she heard her kwami's small voice completing a sentence, "—don't know what to do."

"She can't keep this up. You should have seen her tonight..." Nino trailed off in a hushed voice, obviously not wanting Marinette to hear through the door. She quieted her breathing, listening in on their conversation.

"I agree," Tikki sighed, "but she's stubborn. She won't just give up on her city like that."

Nino hummed in agreement. "This is so much. Marinette...I never knew. She hid it so well."

"That's probably my fault." Tikki let out a soft laugh. "She knows how dangerous it is for civilians to know about us. So does Chat Noir. It's that needed level of secrecy and trust that caused Chat Noir to choose you as a temporary Miraculous holder."

Marinette watched as Nino's shoulders dropped, his head hanging towards his lap. "She had to go through this all alone."

Tikki sighed, floating up closer to Nino's face. "She knows the risks. She knows what she has to give up to be Ladybug. As much as I wish the job wouldn't hurt her, I know she'd never give it up. I can feel how passionate she is when she's Ladybug."

"I..." Nino turned back towards the bathroom door, stiffening and pushing himself to his feet as soon as he saw Marinette standing just outside of it. "Mari! How are you feeling?"

"I'm..." Marinette sighed, letting a small smile fall on her lips, "better."

"Good," Nino smiled, eyes following her as she took a seat on her bed. "Do you mind if I spend the night? I'd just...fell better, after everything that happened."

Marinette looked back and forth between Nino and Tikki, a sneaking suspicion that this might not have been his idea alone lingering in the back of her thoughts.

"Sure, but my parents can't find out, ok?" Marinette yawned before finishing her thought. "They'd freak if they found out a boy spent the night."

"Ok, no problem," Nino smiled, nodding and resuming his spot on her chaise. "I was just talking to Tikki — she was explaining what's been going on."

Marinette looked between her Kwami and her friend skeptically, finally nodding and replacing her expression with one of relief. "Good. I'm glad I don't have to start from the beginning, then."

Nino hummed in agreement, watching Tikki as she flew over to Marinette. "Are you sure you're ok, Marinette?" the Kwami asked, big blue eyes glittering with worry.

"Yes, I really am," she responded, telling the truth. "I was sweating the poison out, and it was hurting my skin. Now that it's off, I feel so much better."

Tikki nodded, pulling a tiny hand down her cheek before flying back a bit. "Good. Now, get some sleep. You have to be as exhausted as I am, probably more."

Marinette opened her mouth to argue, but her lips split into a yawn instead, proving Tikki's point. "Yeah, ok," she said as she exhaled the yawn, sliding into bed as Nino grabbed the quilt draped over the chaise. "If you need anything," she drew his attention as she spoke, "just let me know. Or you can grab it yourself — I have cups in the bathroom, and the sink has a filter on it. Since it's Saturday tomorrow, my parents usually let me sleep until I wake up, but if you hear them knock you have to hide, ok?"

Nino nodded, offering her a small smile. "Yeah, ok. I'll be right here if anything happens. Goodnight, Marinette."

"Goodnight, Nino," Marinette smiled at him, shutting off the lamp at her bedside and falling asleep almost instantly.

* * *

The next day flew by faster than Marinette had been hoping it would. Not that she wanted the weekend to drag by — that wasn't it — but when she woke up at 1:17pm to Nino and Tikki chatting, it occurred her that half of the day had already gone by.

"Sorry you missed breakfast," Marinette told Nino as she stepped out of her bathroom, having changed into a loose, white chiffon top and a pair of maroon capris. She finished tying her hair back into shoulder length pigtails, smiling when Nino waved her sentiment away with his hand.

"Nah, no worries," Nino smiled at her, popping one of the mini-cookies from her bed stand into his mouth. "Tikki's pretty good at sharing."

Marinette nodded, grabbing her purse and looking in at her sleeping Kwami. "When did she fall asleep again?"

"After you went to the bathroom," Nino chuckled, popping one more cookie in his mouth. "So, what now?"

Marinette hummed in agreement with his statement, letting a low sigh fall into the air. "I don't know. You...you have to keep this a secret."

Nino nodded quickly, smiling a little. "Of course. Now that I know, we'll just tell Alya and the two of us can back you up from now on."

Marinette looked at him, brows furrowed and lips pursed. "Alya? No, Nino—"

"I know, she's got the LadyBlog, but who better to help you cover up your secret than her?" Nino explained, pacing back and forth and talking with his hands.

"I—"

"This will be perfect!" He turned back to her, expression filled with excitement until he noticed her's. "What's the matter?"

Marinette took a deep breath in, walking over to her chaise and taking a seat. "Nino...Alya can't know."

Nino laughed, throwing his head back. After a moment, he looked back at her, the joking smirk falling from his face when he saw that Marinette wasn't laughing along. "Wait, you're serious?"

"It's too dangerous that _you_ know, Nino," Marinette explained, watching as any humor left was ripped from his face.

"You...want me to lie to my girlfriend," he stated, eyes narrowing. "Mari, I can't do that."

"You have to." Marinette rose to her feet, taking a step forward just as Nino took a step back.

"Get away from me. You're not serious about this," he seethed, anger falling onto his features. "That's my girlfriend! She's your best friend! Don't you trust her?"

"It's not about trust!" Marinette snapped, anger filling her bones and replacing the dull ache that had lingered since the night before. "It's about _love_. I love her! I love _you_! It's _killing_ me that I have to put you in danger. You can't expect me to do that to her, too."

Nino scoffed, taking another step back. "Wow."

"Nino—"

"I'll see myself out," he spat, turning towards the door to Marinette's room. "If your parents ask, I'll come up with something. I'm sure they're used to being lied to."

"Wait—!" Marinette called after him, but he was already gone, and she couldn't get herself to follow him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all! What do you think?
> 
> Thank you guys so so much for all the kudos and comments - this story has gotten way more positive reception than I expected! I've been trying to respond to every comment, because I really appreciate the feedback :)
> 
> Anyways, the cat's out of the bag (or the Chat, lmao) and obviously Nino's got a problem with lying. What do y'all think is going to happen?
> 
> Until next time,
> 
> ~Ashtyn


	6. Impaired

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yeye y'all, time for some ~*drama*~

**Flutter**

_Chapter 6_

_Impaired_

"And negative _i_ cubed is...?" Ms. Evelyn prompted Marinette, smiling at her gently as the teen took a few moments to think.

"I...it's not right, but I want to say it's negative three _i_?" Marinette fiddled with the black cat eraser she'd stuck on her mechanical pencil, watching Ms. Evelyn sigh.

"Not quite. It's not _multiplied_ by three. It's _cubed_ ," the teacher explained, perking up when Marinette gasped in realization.

"Oh, it's still negative _i_ , isn't it?"

"Right!" Ms. Evelyn held out her hand for a high five, Marinette returning it and smiling.

"Thanks. There's no way I'm gonna fail _this_ test."

Ms. Evelyn tidied up her desk, passing Marinette the study guide for the upcoming precalculus test. She stuffed the packet into a blue folder, shoving it in her bag and standing up. She was about to walk out of her teacher's classroom after a few parting words, but something nagged in the pit of her stomach. Turning around, Marinette cleared her throat, drawing Ms. Evelyn's attention.

"Yes, Marinette?"

"I, uh..." Marinette worried her still-chipped nail polish, opting to look down at her neglected nail beds than at her teacher. "I was waiting all weekend for my parents...I don't know, for you to call them or something."

Ms. Evelyn startled, setting down the stack of papers she'd begun to grade. "Oh? Do you _want_ me to call them?"

"No!" Marinette rushed the word out, moving her arms wildly in front of her as she spoke. "Thank you for _not_ calling them, actually. It's just...why?"

Ms. Evelyn considered her next words, lips pursed in thought. "You're seventeen, aren't you?" Marinette nodded in response, urging her teacher to continue. "You're almost an adult. I figured that if you needed to talk to them, that was your decision to make."

Marinette nodded once more, mouth hanging just slightly open. "Oh."

"Any other questions? I don't want you to completely miss lunch," Ms. Evelyn smiled at her student, picking up the stack of papers in front of her once more and continuing to grade them.

"No. Thank you."

And just like that, Marinette was free of the consequences she'd been dreading all weekend, heavy and sore feet carrying her out to the courtyard. Her stomach did a backflip when Adrien spotted her, waving her over. Nino and Alya were sitting close to one another, their backs facing the bluenette. Tentatively, she made her way over to them, wincing when Nino looked back at her over his shoulder.

"Hey," Marinette spoke in a too-soft voice as she took a seat between Adrien and Alya, avoiding Nino's gaze. "How's lunch?"

"Oh, fine," Adrien answered, completely oblivious to the growing tension between Marinette and his best friend. Alya, however, picked up on it right away, her gaze fluttering between the two. "You were studying with Ms. Evelyn?"

Marinette nodded slowly, turning her attention fully towards Adrien. "Yeah, that precalc test was going to kick my ass unless I figured out imaginary numbers."

Before Adrien could even open his mouth to talk, Nino cut him off by clearing his throat, effectively drawing everyone's attention towards himself. "Marinette, I need to talk to you."

Marinette started sweating, casually wiping her brow and sighing in relief when it wasn't a dark grey color. "Yes, that's fine."

The two stood quickly, shuffling about a hundred yards away from any of their classmates. Nino's expression was guarded, as if he wasn't totally sure about what he was about to say.

After a few moments of silence, Marinette spoke up, her voice somehow smaller still than it had been before. "You made a decision."

Nino nodded, and Marinette's stomach took a dive in the deep end. "Did you tell her?"

After a few hour-long seconds, Nino shook his head, sending an only slightly painful shudder of relief up her spine. "I couldn't."

"Oh my gosh _thank you_ Nino—"

"Because I realized you're right," Nino's tone was tight. "She can't be in danger. Not over this."

Marinette nodded, gazing back to Alya, who quickly looked away upon realizing she was looking at her. "I know."

Nino rubbed his eyes, sighing and shaking his head slowly as he took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. "This is going to be hell."

"I know." It was all she seemed to be able to say.

"I'm sorry," Nino put his glasses back on, looking at her with so much sincerity that it nearly knocked the breath from her throat. "It wasn't fair of me to freak out on you like that. I just needed a day to process all of it."

"Of course," Marinette breathed the words out. "I'm so sorry it has to be this way."

Nino nodded, smiling down at her before pulling her into a tight hug. Right away, Marinette stiffened up, her anxiety skyrocketing. As soon as she resigned to that fact that she was safe and alright, she relaxed into his embrace, letting out a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding.

* * *

"So we corner the bastard...somehow," Ladybug scowled as she spoke, pacing one of the upper-level beams of the Eiffel Tower. She worried her lip with her teeth, cursing under her breath when no solutions presented themselves.

"That's the big question, isn't it," Chat responded, lounging on a beam perpendicular to the one she was pacing. "How do you lure a villain who never shows his face?"

"Fucking _coward_ ," Ladybug punched one of the upright beams, whining lightly when her fist came back throbbing. "Ouch."

"Woah, Ladybug," Chat was at her side in a second, studying her gloved hand carefully. "Can I—"

"Sure, it's fine," she hissed, turning away from her partner and scowling as he removed the tight glove from her pained hand.

"Bugaboo, why'd you do that?" his voice was as light as his touch as his fingers trailed over her knuckles.

"I don't know, ok?" Ladybug pulled her hand away forcefully as she spoke, turning completely away from Chat as all of her pain was replaced by seething frustration. "I don't know!"

"Hey, hey," Chat turned her towards him, letting her azure eyes meet his own green ones. "Maybe it's a side effect?"

After another three seconds of staring into his eyes, Ladybug's anger fell away, once again replaced by the throbbing pain in her hand, and the low ache in the rest of her bones. "I...think you're right."

Chat nodded, offering her the tiniest of smiles, which she quickly returned. "We'll keep an eye on it. Hawkmoth is going down, and soon. I won't let him hurt you anymore."

Ladybug nodded, hot tears prickling in the corners of her eyes. "And what if we don't? What if...we _can't_?"

Chat shushed her, pulling her into a supportive hug. "I will kill that man if it's the last thing I do. He deserves worse after everything's he's done."

"We don't _kill_ people, Chat!" Ladybug sobbed into his shoulder, nuzzling into the hard muscle. "You know you can't— we can't—"

" _You_ can't," Chat corrected, rubbing small circles in her back. "You're Ladybug. That's why I'm going to take care of it. For you."

Ladybug sobbed harder, shaking in her partner's arms. "I can't. You can't. Please don't do this for me."

"You don't get to decide this," Chat sighed, placing a gentle kiss on the top of her head. Ladybug pulled away just enough to crane her neck up, eyes locking with his. "I love you, Ladybug."

"Chat—"

"And I know," he closed his eyes, entire form shuddering against Ladybug's body, "it's not safe for us to get involved. It's not even _logical_ , but..."

Ladybug looked at him, waiting for him to finish his sentence. When he didn't, she blew a small puff of air out of her mouth, bringing her hands up to his face. Her cold, ungloved fingers rested on his left cheek, gloved hand on his right. Chat's eyes fluttered open, and Ladybug did something she could only hope to blame on the poison.

Going on her tip-toes, Ladybug pressed her lips to his, melting as his embrace tightened protectively. Her hands snaked their way behind his head, lightly brushing the hairs at the nape of his neck. After a few moments, she pulled away, Chat's hot breath lingering in the back of her throat.

"Ladybug," he breathed, cheeks flushed bright pink as he blinked down at her.

"I shouldn't have done that," she whispered, eyes slipping down to his lips — his swollen, pink, _warm_ lips — then back up to his eyes. "I'm sorry."

Before she could continue, Chat pulled her towards him again, kissing her once more. While the earlier kiss had been slow and soft, this one was fast and heavy, Chat's strong hands pulling her lower back towards himself. Ladybug tried to stop — tried to tell him this wasn't going to end well — but she was so intoxicated by the surge of emotions that replaced any pain she'd just been in. Slowly, she grew more aggressive as well, fingers tugging at his hair and eliciting a low, rumbling groan.

Chat bit her lip lightly, bringing the red and black spotted heroine back to her senses in one disorienting moment. She pulled away too fast, the back of her head banging painfully against the beam directly behind her.

"Ow."

"Oh my gosh, M'Lady!" he chuckled, one hand brushing the back of her head. "Are you ok?"

Ladybug looked at him with tears in her eyes, pulling away and looking out at the sparkling city. "This was a mistake."

"Not if you don't want it to be," her partner's voice was so soft, it released a few of the tears she'd been holding back.

"I'll see you tomorrow night. Forget this ever happened."

Before he could argue, Ladybug took off across the city, letting the cool night air lick her skin. She realized halfway home that she'd left her glove with Chat. She'd have to retrieve it the next night before patrol.

Just as she was rounding the corner to a familiar alleyway next to her house, Ladybug heard a loud, thumping crash from two alleys over. Sighing, she readied herself for a fight, swinging towards the sound noiselessly. Upon landing above the alleyway, she was relieved it was just a group of college-aged students, passing around two bottles of hard liquor. She was about to turn and find her way back when a familiar voice stuck out, drawing her attention.

"Oh, Antoni," her shrill tone was unmistakeable, causing Ladybug to shudder lightly.

Taking one look, it was suddenly obvious what was going on. Chloe sat with the elder students, the biggest guy's arm tightly around her. Someone on her other side — a mid-twenties woman with pink and purple hair — handed her one of the bottles, and the blonde took a swig that made Ladybug shudder. She had enough experience with liquor to know that that was far too much to drink at once, not even counting what she may have already drank.

"Chlo, I love you, baby," the man — Antoni — pulled her closer, eliciting a series of high-pitched giggles from Chloe.

"I love you too, baby," she sank into his embrace, taking another too-big swig and passing the bottle to him.

Ladybug had half a mind to intervene. After all, Chloe was only sixteen, turning seventeen in about two months. Some of these people looked like they might even be in their late twenties. It didn't seem safe to her. At the same time...how would she explain herself if she _did_ get involved? As much as she wanted to help, she couldn't come up with a feasible excuse that didn't reveal a connection to Chloe outside of being Ladybug.

As much as it pained her, she turned away, using her yo-yo to swing her back to her usual alley.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all! What do you think?
> 
> I know, I know, this story isn't supposed to be about romance. And overall, it isn't. This is more than anything meant to shed some light on how impulsive she's become. That being said, what do you guys think about the recent developments?
> 
> Thank you so much to all my wonderful readers! A very special thanks to those who follow, leave kudos, and write comments - y'all honestly make my day.
> 
> Until Sunday!
> 
> ~Ashtyn


	7. Secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's just say Marinette's secret isn't as secure as she'd hoped it would be

**Flutter**

_Chapter 7_

_Secret_

"Hang on, you and Chat Noir _what_?!" Nino demanded in a hushed tone, both him and Marinette standing in the corner of their home room classroom. She was well aware of Alya glaring holes into both of their heads, though that wasn't her primary concern at the moment.

"Yeah, we...kissed..." Marinette muttered her words, a hot blush rising to her cheeks. "I wasn't doing well, and Chat is so...he's just..."

"Wait wait wait," Nino held up his hands, stopping Marinette, "do you have feelings for him? I thought Tikki said—"

"I know what she said!" Marinette snapped too loud, drawing the chattering students' attention towards herself. With a scowl and a low growl, she turned to face them. "Mind your own business, assholes!"

Most of the expressions around the room were shocked, though Chloe looked delighted by Marinette's outburst, Sabrina whispering quietly in her ear. She'd have to deal with that later. _Great._

"Woah, Mari!" Nino held his hands up in surrender, bringing her gaze back to his. "Chill, ok?"

Marinette took three deep breaths, the shaking she hadn't noticed ceasing. As soon as the anger drained from her body, it was replaced by the same dull, throbbing, _annoying_ pain. She hated that fucking pain.

"Ok. Ok, I'm sorry," she sighed, tears prickling at her tear ducts. With a quick swipe, her hand was smudged with inky black, causing her to cringe back in shock. "Shit."

Nino gave her a questioning glance before looking down at her hands. "Fuck, are you crying the—"

"Yes," she hissed lightly, grabbing one of the used tissues from the side pocket of her backpack and hastily wiping her hand. She dabbed it around her eyes, soaking up the tears before they could fall. "I'm fine."

"You're obviously not—"

"I'm fine!" Marinette yelled it this time, once more drawing the rest of the class' attention. With a sigh, she walked back to her desk, deciding for Nino that e conversation was over.

"Hey, Mari…" Alya greeted her upon sitting down, pondering her next words carefully. "So…what's going on with you and _my boyfriend,_ " the last two words had a bitter edge to them, causing the bluenette to stiffen.

"Nino? Alya, you know we're just friends. We'd never…what do you _think_ is going on?" Marinette worried her lip as she spoke, biting too hard and drawing a few droplets of metallic blood. She swiped her tongue across the wound quickly, hoping Alya didn't notice.

Alya sighed, hanging her head and shutting her eyes hard. "I'm not the only one who's noticed. You can't…just tell me what's going on, ok?"

Marinette stared at her best friend, considering her next words with an air of anxiety. "Nothing's going on. We're just good friends, Alya. Like you and Adrien, you know?"

"Yeah," Alya snapped, her gaze shifting back to Marinette's face, "but Adrien and I don't keep secrets from Nino. You're really not going to tell me what's going on?"

Marinette inhaled sharply, hiding the wince that followed. "You know Nino loves you more than just about anything. Are you really questioning that?"

Alya snorted. "Gaslighting. Nice move. It's almost like talking to my _mom_ , and you know how I feel about that."

"Alya—"

Ms. Evelyn interrupted their conversation by stepping up to the front of the room, causing the students lingering around the classroom to make their way back to their seats. "Class is starting," Alya retorted, turning away from Marinette and focusing solely on their teacher.

* * *

"Marinette, hold up," Ms. Evelyn called after the teenager, this time not drawing the attention of her friends. They were occupied by the fight slowly breaking out between Nino and Alya, and Marinette could hardly stomach it. Ms. Evelyn's attention was a welcomed distraction.

"Yes?"

"I noticed…" the teacher sighed, eyes gliding down to her feet. "I hate to pry, but I noticed you and Alya were fighting? Maybe something about Nino?"

Despite her status as a teacher, Ms. Evelyn was observant of their social affairs. Marinette would have to keep that fact in mind for the future. "Yeah, we're…things are a little complicated right now."

"Do you want to talk about it?" the teacher asked, drawing Marinette's complete attention. It took more willpower than before to keep from spilling, her deep breaths shuddering against her aching chest.

"I…". She shouldn't. She shouldn't. This was getting dangerously close to her identity as Ladybug, and she knew deep down that she shouldn't be talking about any of it, but Ms. Evelyn was giving her that look that seemed to scream ' _Let me help you!_ ', and she just couldn't keep it all inside anymore. "Nino and I have to keep a secret, and Alya think's we- that we- that we'd—"

"Oh, Marinette," Ms. Evelyn rushed forward, grabbing both of the teen's shaking hands. "What's going on? You can tell me anything, I swear."

Marinette sobbed, wishing desperately that her teacher was right, though she knew she couldn't share her deepest secrets. Nino had found them, after all, and the chaos that ensued was causing her current distress. Or, at the very least, greatly contributing to it. "I can't."

"Yes," Ms. Evelyn brushed a loose strand of Marinette's hair behind her ear, her green eyes glinting black for half a second before returning to their natural state. Marinette must have been seeing things, now, too. _Wonderful_. "You can tell me anything."

Marinette pulled away, shouldering her bag and wiping away (thankfully) clear tears. "I have to get to class."

Ms. Evelyn looked like she wanted to say more, but the bluenette was quick, turning hastily and nearly running out of the classroom. Upon rounding the corner, she ran into someone, _hard_ , toppling the both of them over.

"Fucker! Watch where you're going!" Chloe's shrill voice pinched against every aching nerve Marinette had.

"Oh, fuck you, you alcoholic _slut_!" Marinette's words were out of her mouth before she could stop them, a shocked hand coming up to trembling lips the moment she realized what she'd said. Why had she said that? She'd never called anyone a slut in her life. Self hate colored her entire form, shaking and curling in on herself as Chloe grabbed her bag off the ground and made her way to her feet.

"Oh, you're one to talk, miss Nino's mistress!" Chloe spat down at the shaking heroine, angry tone faltering upon realizing Marinette was trembling. "Woah, you're, like, shaking. What, are you on meth or something?"

"Chloe, no," Marinette shuddered the words out, trying to sit up, only to be overwhelmed by the anger and fear and _pain oh my god the pain_.

"It would explain the shakes, the mood swings," as Chloe spoke, she helped Marinette stand, grabbing her bag and handing it to her. Marinette took it with jackhammer hands, slinging it unsteadily over her shoulder as she leaned on Chloe for support.

"I'm not- not on drugs," Marinette's teeth were chattering now. Why did she feel so terrible? What had changed? There hadn't been another Akuma attack since last night, and she'd already dealt with those symptoms. "It's…I'm _sick_ and I don't know what the hell is _happening_ to me!"

Chloe looked taken aback, her face taught with something Marinette didn't recognize from the heiress. With a start, she realized it was worry. Concern. From _Chloe_ , of all people. Had things really gotten so bad that Chloe was worried about her? Marinette shuddered harder at the revelation.

"Let's get you to the nurse's office, ok? I've seen a lot of people go through drug withdrawals. Really, there's no shame in asking for help, you know?" the blonde fiddled with her perfectly manicured, baby blue nails as she spoke. "You can do this."

Marinette almost smiled. Why was sh being so nice? Did she really look that bad? "It's not drugs, it's—"

Her words were drowned out by a pounding, crashing wave that hit her throbbing skull. She lurched forward, falling into Chloe's firm grasp. "Marinette? Marinette! What's going on?!"

"Bathroom," Marinette hissed the word, the burning bile sneaking up her throat. "Bathroom, please!"

Chloe complied wordlessly, dragging Marinette along with her to the bathroom before glaring at a few underclass girls touching up their makeup. "Out!" she demanded, earning a few startled yelps. Within seconds, the bathroom was empty, and Marinette was hunched over the toilet bowl, heaving and retching as the bile continued to sneak up on her. "It's ok, you'll feel better once you let it out," Chloe rubbed soothing circles in Marinette's lower back, earning a cold, sweaty shudder.

Before Marinette could do or say anything, the poison was spewing out of her, splashing violently into the toilet bowl and licking her face. She continued for a few moments before the vomit ceased, giving her a moment to catch her breath. Apparently, it wasn't her lucky day, because as soon as she caught her breath, hot saliva filled her mouth again, signaling that she wasn't done just yet. Another round of hacking, burning vomit shot from her body, this time causing even more splash back. Chloe was cursing under her breath, though Marinette wasn't in the right state of mind to listen. When the poison finally slowed to a stop, Marinette sighed, hanging her head in misery. Chloe's hand had paused, still resting on her lower back, and she could tell it was from shock. It had to be.

"The black bile…" Chloe trailed off, realization coloring her voice.

"Stop," Marinette moaned, knowing it was already too late. The last person she wanted to know her secret knew, and there was nothing she could do about it.

"Fuck, you were telling the truth. This is _bad_."

"Please, just…" Marinette's moaning breaths caught up with her, sending another volley of shivers up her back. "You can't…know…"

"Ladybug," Chloe breathed the word so softly, it almost fell deaf on Marinette's foggy ears. "Let me help you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all! What do you think?
> 
> This is really a turning point for the story - there might be one or two more filler chapters, but most are going to be pretty busy, so stay tuned!
> 
> At the risk of oversharing, I wanted to let you guys know that my dog is being put down today, so any extra love would be greatly appreciated <3
> 
> Thank you so much to those of you who have commented, followed, and left kudos. Thank you.
> 
> Until Tuesday,
> 
> ~Ashtyn


	8. Heiress

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's dig into Chloe's reaction, shall we?

**Flutter**

_Chapter 8_

_Heiress_

Marinette had a hard time remembering exactly how she ended up sandwiched between Chloe and Nino in the small, unisex single toilet bathroom. Chloe held her hair back while Nino explained to her what was going on. It took too long to realize that Marinette was hacking into the toilet, a gruesome mixture of blood and the poison sprinkling the seat and floating atop the water. With a few more shuddering gasps, she sat up straight, batting Chloe's gentle hands away from her neck.

"Get away from me!" she growled, wild and rabid, like a feral cat. She hastily crab walked over to the corner of the bathroom, pressing herself against the cool, cement walls as much as possible. "When did I get here?" She locked eyes with Nino, who she trusted more than Chloe. "What's going on?"

"You don't remember?" Nino asked, shock coloring his voice, though he had a handle on his expression, which remained calm.

"No," the word was a sharp hiss of air.

"How can you not—" Chloe started in that tone that made Marinette want to throw a rock at her.

"Chloe, chill," Nino put a hand on her shoulder before moving slowly towards Marinette. He was treating her like a wounded animal. "You called out for me when Chloe was helping you. She brought you here and grabbed me from class. You've been…purging the poison for almost fifteen minutes now."

Marinette shuddered, stinging sweat bubbling across her skin. She needed to get it off, though that wasn't the issue at the top of her mind. She glared daggers at Chloe, shuddering in tight breaths. "You know."

"I do," Chloe's tone softened, her eyes painted with pity. _Pity_. From _Chloe_ , of all people. Marinette must have really been fucked up.

"It's on me," Marinette wheezed, flicking her attention back to Nino. His eyes widened, anxious teeth worrying his bottom lip. "I need it off."

"Ok. Ok. Your parents are home…my mom has been working from home lately…"

"The locker rooms?" Chloe suggested.

"Gym class," Nino explained.

"I…grab her, and follow me," Chloe sighed the words, as if she really didn't want to do what she was about to.

Nino made his way towards Marinette, who pushed herself further back out of instinct. "I'm going to help, ok?" he cooed. "Chloe and I are going to help you. I promise."

Marinette finally relaxed a little, nodding quickly and letting Nino scoop her up. She wheezed, her vision going black from the pain shooting up and down her limbs. "Shit shit, fuck this _hurts_ , Nino. Nino it _hurts_."

"I know," Nino's words were strained as she felt him walk her out of the bathroom. "Just hold on, ok? We'll take care of you. I promise."

Marinette opened her mouth to say something else, only to be cut off by a burning pain that radiated across her entire form. Her mind went blank, body falling limp as all other stimuli was shut off.

* * *

When Marinette came to again, she was bundled tightly in a cocoon of blankets. Her hair had been tied back at one point, and she was in a set of soft pajamas. Blinking her eyes open, she cringed back against the sunlight streaming in through the microwave sized window. She turned away, holding a shaking hand against her pounding head.

"Ugh," she moaned, "where am I?"

She wasn't expecting a response, so when someone who sounded suspiciously like Chloe began to speak, it made Marinette jump out of her skin. "You're safe, Ladybug."

Marinette sat up straight, ignoring the pain that flared through her and looking around the room with wild eyes. As soon as her gaze landed on Chloe, the blonde raised her hands in surrender, clearly something she'd picked up from Nino. "It's just me."

" _J_ _ust you_ ," Marinette spat, swinging her legs over the side of the bed and trying to stand. Upon putting a fraction of her weight on her legs, she nearly toppled over, Chloe catching her just before she hit the floor.

"Ladybug!"

"Stop calling me that!" Marinette's words were as sharp as the pain shooting into her chest. "You're not supposed to call me that."

Chloe deposited Marinette back on the bed, taking a few steps back and hanging her head. "I'm sorry, La— Marinette. It's just…I've always wanted to help Ladybug, you know? Even when she…when _you_ stood up to me, you were still a hero. I guess I just want to be a part of that."

Her sincerity shocked Marinette, her brows furrowing. "You want to help me?"

"Why wouldn't I?"

Marinette didn't know whether to be flattered or offended. On one hand, Chloe was helping her. She'd brought her…somewhere safe, and she must have been the one to help clean her up and get her changed. But she was also doing it for Ladybug, not for Marinette — that much was clear. The real question was, was she trustworthy? Could Marinette really put her secrets in the hands of a spoiled rotten heiress? With a shudder, she realized she didn't have a choice anymore. The cat was out of the bag.

"Where am I?" Marinette asked after a few moments, causing Chloe to look away quickly.

"Sabrina's apartment. Or her parents', I guess. She gave me a key, like, a year ago. Just in case, you know?" Chloe explained.

Marinette nodded in response, considering her next words carefully. "You can't tell anyone. Not Sabrina. Not Antoni. No one."

Chloe's attention snapped to Marinette, blue eyes turning icy. "How do you know about Antoni?"

She realized what she'd said too late, looking away to avoid the frigid glare. "I was patrolling, and I saw you. And his friends, I'm guessing."

Chloe sighed, drawing Marinette's attention back to her. "Ok. Well, don't worry about Antoni. We don't talk that often, so it shouldn't be a problem."

The heroine wanted to ask more about the relationship, though she didn't know if it was her place. After all, she wasn't even supposed to know about the older man. Deciding to come back to the topic at a later date, she leaned back against the plush pillows behind her. "And Sabrina?"

"She'll be harder to keep a secret from. We tell each other everything." Chloe sounded so sad as she spoke, her gulp a swallow of rocks. "I'll try my best, though."

Marinette nodded, letting her eyes close for a few moments. "Where is Nino?"

"He went back to school. He's gonna bring you and I the assignments we're missinf, and then the three of us are going to have a conversation."

"About what?"

Chloe laughed — the kind of cold, empty laugh that she gave when she was annoyed. "You can't seriously…Marinette, you're throwing up _poison_. We have to figure this out."

Marinette stared at her in surprise, trying to lift her jaw off the floor. "Why do _we_ have to figure this out? It's my problem."

"No it's not. You're dying because you're protecting us. You shouldn't have to deal with this alone."

"But Chat—"

"Doesn't know you behind the mask," Chloe's tone took on a protective edge. "Besides, that dumb cat would probably mess things up worse. Best you leave him out of it."

Marinette's blood boiled, the pain fleeing from her bones to make room for the onslaught of emotion. "Chat does _not_ mess things up. He's the best partner I could ever have — I'm not cutting him out of this."

"But—"

"Look, this is my problem, so either we work on my terms, or you get the fuck out of my life."

Chloe raised her brows at Marinette, chuckling lightly. "Wow, this stuff's giving you an attitude, huh?"

Marinette froze, the anger dripping from her mind, immediately replaced by the throbbing, shooting pain. Chloe was right. Marinette hadn't been able to control her emotions since the poison had gotten worse. She'd just thought she was stressed, but the ever present — unless she was over emotional — pain begged to differ. Something else was going on here, and she had a bad feeling about it.

"I guess it is…"

"Wait, you didn't realize that?" Chloe snorted now, earning a sharp glare from Marinette. "Sorry, jeez. It must be bad. You only ever lose your temper when I push you too hard."

Marinette pinched the bridge of her nose. "Could we please not talk about you shitting on me?"

"Well, sure. I'm not gonna mess with you anymore, you know."

Marinette snapped her eyes open. "You won't?"

"Of course not. Nino and I are the only people who know what's going on, and we're going to help you. For all the times you've helped us."

The sentiment was almost enough to make Marinette cry, though she didn't know how much the poison was adding to her emotions. "Thank you."

Chloe nodded tightly, as if showing the small amount of compassion she'd displayed was difficult. "Of course."

* * *

By the time Nino got back, Marinette had eaten as much as she could, which was about a quarter of what she usually had for lunch, and managed to keep it down. Chloe had brushed and braided her hair — a complex series of loops and knots that looked like something someone would wear to prom.

"Where did you learn to do hair like that?" she had asked.

"My mother," Chloe's answer had sounded so bitter that she didn't dare press for more information.

After letting Marinette change into the spare set of clothes Chloe kept at Sabrina's, the heiress talked with Tikki, asking a series of questions, when Nino came into the small apartment.

"Sorry it took so long. Alya and Adrien…" Nino shuddered and tensed up, like there was something he wanted to tell Marinette, but his uncertain gaze towards Chloe gave away that she made him nervous. "Anyways, I've got the homework. Did everything go alright here?"

"Yeah," Chloe looked between Nino and Marinette skeptically, having picked up on the silent glances they were sending one another. "I got her cleaned up, and talked to Tikki for a bit, so things are ok."

"Good," Nino sighed in relief, setting his bag down and taking a seat on Sabrina's green-sheeted bed next to Marinette. "And you're feeling better?"

"Of course," Marinette bumped his shoulder with her own. "No need to worry about me, _mom_."

"Woah now, that's offensive to your mother," Nino joked, ruffling Marinette's meticulously done hair.

"Hey!" both Chloe and Marinette screeched at the same time, Nino cracking up in response.

"Wow, Chloe and Marinette? _Agreeing_ on something? Now that's unheard of."

"I always agree with Ladybug," Chloe interjected, causing a scowl to fall onto Marinette's lips.

"Ok, so that needs to stop," Marinette managed not to yell the words in spite of her growing frustration.

"What?"

"They whole calling me Ladybug thing. If you're going to help Ladybug, than means you're helping me, too. Ok?"

Chloe paused for a second before crossing her arms in front of her. "You don't think I know that?"

"Well you're not acting like you do," Marinette rose to her feet, the anger quickly replacing her pain. _Oh no_.

"Look, this is, like, brand fucking new to me," Chloe spat, causing Marinette's anger to flare.

"I don't give a shit!"

"Like hell I care about what you think, Marinette!"

"Oh, now that you're angry, you can call me by my name. But when you like me, it has to be Ladybug? What the hell?!"

"Woah, there," Nino stepped in between the two girls, holding his hands up on either side of him to add to thee distance between them.

"Stay out of it, Nino!" they both snapped at the same time, continuing to glare at one another.

"Look, Marinette, why don't I walk you home, then," Nino grabbed the bluenette's arm, pulling her away from Chloe.

After shooting Chloe another hard glance, Marinette finally nodded, focusing her attention back on Nino. "Ok. But I swear to god that if she tells one soul—"

"I won't," some of the edge fell from Chloe's voice. "I promise."

"Whatever," Marinette mumbled, letting Nino drag her out of Sabrina's room and out of the apartment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all! What do you think?
> 
> Right away, I just wanted to thank those of you who wished me well concerning my dog - it really does mean a lot <3
> 
> Also, what does everyone think about Chloe's (and Marinette's) reaction? Things will definitely progress...interestingly, and probably unexpectedly, so get ready!
> 
> Thank you so so much to those of you who comment, leave kudos, and bookmark! I love getting those notifications :)
> 
> Until Sunday,
> 
> ~Ashtyn


	9. Push

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas to those who celebrate! To those who don't, consider this a thank you for putting up with everything Christmas. Thank you, and enjoy!

**Flutter**

_Chapter 9_

_Push_

Patrol the night after Chloe found out was tense. Well, tense may have been an understatement. Things were excruciatingly awkward, the duo hardly talking unless they absolutely had to. After all, they both were well aware of the implications of their litle stunt the night before. Ladybug's insistence that they not talk about it, however, only seemed to add to the intense situation. After an Akuma-less night, they both turned in, Ladybug making a mental note to tell Chat about her secret being blown another time. They had time, after all.

Upon stumbling into her room, Marinette panted heavily, the lack of Ladybug suit making her dizzy in sudden pain.

"Marinette," Tikki moaned, falling into her shaking hands lightly.

"Shit, Tikki. Here, let's get you some food," the bluenette rushed to her bedside, throwing open the top drawer and depositing her Kwami on the small pile of scrap fabric, surrounded by mini cookies. When she started to nibble on one of the cookies, Marinette relaxed, taking a seat on her bed and sighing in relief. She could handle the pain and exhaustion, but Marinette knew that Tikki was far more fragile. It was good to know that she was going to be ok.

Marinette slept restlessly that night, the glaring possibility that she was missing something crucial tugging at the deepest corners of her mind. She kept waking up in a cold sweat, Chat's too-familiar eyes lingering in her mind. Something else weighed on her, too. Something wasn't right with the Akuma's poison. Why was she getting worse when there wasn't an Akuma around? Was it just that it had a delayed effect? That couldn't be right. After all, she experienced symptoms immediately after purifying them. So what was going on? What else was contributing to her condition?

As hard as Marinette contemplated her racing questions, she couldn't land on an answer, resigning herself to restless sleep once more.

* * *

"Marinette, I need to talk to you," Alya greeted Marinette with a hard glare the moment she walked into homeroom, her arms crossed tightly against her chest.

"Ok, sure," Marinette shouldered her backpack, hiding a wince when her chest heaved in pain. _Just keep going. Don't let her see you break_. The two walked over to the corner of the room, drawing Chloe's attention, Sabrina's following shortly.

"What the hell is going on between you and Nino?" Alya's tone was so harsh, Marinette winced back in response.

"Alya, I already told you—"

Alya held up her left hand, effectively stopping Marinette from continuing. "Cut the crap, Mari. I'm not blind. You two left class for, like, a long ass time yesterday. When He came back, he was so out of breath…do you really think I'm stupid?"

Marinette gaped at her best friend, chest twisting painfully in guilt and shame. "I'm sorry."

Alya appeared to be taken aback by her response, arms dropping to her sides. "What do you mean, _I'm sorry_?! Are you admitting that you're…that you two…"

"No!" Marinette snapped, the anger taking the place of her pain once more. _Oh fuck_.

"Then what's going on!"

"I can't tell you!"

Alya gaped at Marinette, noticing how her chest was heaving in anger. "What the actual fuck. I thought you were head over heals for Adrien, last time I checked, When did you decide that my boyfriend was someone…something you…"

Marinette watched her friend trail off, at a loss for words. "I'm sorry."

"So you admit it."

"No," Marinette huffed, brows furrowing, "that's not what I'm saying. I'm just…I'm so sorry I can't tell you what's going on. I'm so so sorry."

Alya closed her gaping lips, nodding tightly. "Fine. That's… _fine_. Just stay the fuck away from me, ok?"

"But, Alya—"

Before she could finish, Alya walked away, strolling right up to Ms. Evelyn, who was at her desk grading papers. "Ms. Evelyn, I'd like to move desks, please. You can seat Nino and Marinette next to each other," those words were spat with a glance back at Marinette.

* * *

"She broke up with me," Nino hissed to Marinette the moment class was over, having obviously wanted to say something sooner. It was Marinette's guess that he'd restrained himself due to Alya's close proximity.

Marinette hung her head, hands coming up to rub throbbing temples. "I can't believe this. She can't be serious—"

"Hey, Nino? Marinette?" Adrien's soft voice came from behind the two, startling Marinette into a jump. They both turned back to him, noticing his thinly concealed anger. "Can I talk to you guys?"

Nino opened and closed his mouth like a fish, unsure of what to say. "Sure," Marinette sighed, following Adrien out into the courtyard, Nino following closely.

"Ok, so what's going on with you guys?" Adrien asked, turning back towards them and crossing his arms over his chest.

"My god, how many times do I have to explain this?" Marinette threw her hands up in the air as she spoke. "There's nothing going on!"

"Then why is Alya a mess?" Adrien asked, tone harsh and bitter. He was trying to protect Alya.

"Because she won't believe me. Or Nino. She trusts us less than I thought, I guess," Marinette retorted, arms beginning to shake at her sides as the pain ebbed from her bones. _Shit_.

"Ok, but you two are keeping some sort of secret, right?" Adrien asked, taking a deep breath every few words to keep his own anger in check.

Nino and Marinette shared a quick look, something Adrien no doubt picked up on. "No," they spoke at once, causing the model's brows to furrow.

"Ok, so you definitely are. You know you can trust her with anything, right?" Adrien pinched the bridge of his nose, exhaling deeply. "You can trust me with anything."

Marinette looked back at Nino, who was visibly struggling to maintain his calm composure. If she didn't act, he'd break and tell him everything. "I know I can," Marinette responded, "and I would. We both would. Maybe Nino and I are just good friends, ever thought of that, pretty boy?"

"What did you just call me?" Adrien's eyes snapped open, glaring at her with fiery intensity.

"What, poor little model boy has trust issues?" the words were pulled from Marinette's lips against her will. "Oh, boo-hoo. Go cry to daddy about it."

Adrien took a small step back, brows raising in surprise. "Ok, what the hell is going on? You…I've _told_ you about my dad, Mari. I can't…how could you bring him up?"

Marinette took a defensive step forward, batting Nino's warning hand away. "Look, you're not entitled to know everything about everyone, ok? If you think you are, you must be just as spoiled as I thought you were when we first met."

"You thought I was _what_?!" Adrien took a step towards her as well, their faces only six inches away. Marinette's breath caught in her throat, though she swallowed it quickly.

"You heard me."

"You're…you're…impossible!"

"I know you are, but what am I?"

"Oh fucking hell Marinette, don't act like a little kid."

"Would a little kid do this?" Marinette planted her feet on the ground, her hands coming in front of her as she pushed Adrien — _hard_. He fell backwards, butt hitting the grass hard.

"Holy shit." Marinette couldn't tell if the words were coming from Adrien or Nino, her vision tunneling around her shaking hands.

"I…I didn't want to do that."

"Marinette—" that one was Adrien, she could tell by the scared, angry shake of his voice.

"We have to get out of here," Nino interrupted, grabbing one of Marinette's hands and snapping her out of whatever trance she was in. As soon as he did, the anger fled from her body, replaced with searing, burning pain. She stumbled towards Nino, hissing in pain when he pulled at her arm.

"Ow, shit, fuck it's back," she growled, closing her eyes to keep the flaming light from reaching her aching eyes.

"Let's go," Nino pulled her along, not waiting for a response.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all, what do you think?
> 
> I know - a post out of schedule, what??? Well, I celebrate Christmas, and wanted to give everyone - celebrating and not - a little gift and a big thank you for all the amazing reception this story has been getting <3
> 
> That being said, where do y'all think this is going? I'm just curious - it gets pretty twisted here quick, so I want to see if anyone knows where I'm going with it ;)
> 
> Thank you so so much to those of you who comment, bookmark, and leave kudos - it honestly means the world to me
> 
> Until Sunday,
> 
> ~Ashtyn


	10. Kick

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, I forgot to post on Sunday D:
> 
> Let's see some extra spicy dramatics, yeah?

**Flutter**

_Chapter 10_

_Kick_

_*physical abuse trigger warning*_

"We need to talk," Chat's voice was harsh as it rang through Ladybug's yo-yo. She had just transformed moments prior, and wasn't expecting him to reach out so soon. "It's important."

"Ok. Louve at ten, then?"

"No, we need to talk _now_."

"Ok, then let's meet at the Louve _in_ ten, yeah?"

"Sure," the word was a quick sigh just before he hung up, leaving Ladybug staring down at her phone, brows furrowed and lips pursed. What did he need to talk about?

Was it the kiss? They hadn't talked about it last night, and they'd both been productive enough in stopping petty crimes. Did he have a plan for how to deal with Hawkmoth? That wouldn't be so urgent, though. She sighed, resigning herself to wondering as she did a quick lap around one of the particularly bad neighborhoods. Immediately, her attention was caught by a high pitched, giggling laugh. _Chloe's_ laugh. Ladybug swung towards the sound, settling atop one of the buildings overlooking a small corner tucked away in a bad part of Paris.

"Antoni, stop!" Chloe giggled, wrenching herself away from the older man, who had been tickling her in jest. "You know I'm ticklish!"

"Hey, baby, you're ok." There was an edge to his voice that Ladybug didn't like at all. Chloe seemed too intoxicated to catch on to it. "Come'ere," his words slurred against one another.

"No, wait, let me catch my—" Chloe began.

"I said come _here_!" Antoni stood hastily, leaving Chloe on the ground. She tried to stumble to her feet, but fell over right away. "Dumb bitch," the words were somehow spat and chuckled out at the same time, his smile wicked in the sparse light of the alleyway.

"Antoni?" Chloe's voice was so small, Ladybug hardly heard it from her resting spot.

The next few moments were a blur of motion; Antoni pulled his leg back to kick Chloe, aiming right for her head. The beginning of a scream painted the dirty brick walls. Ladybug moved with superhuman speed, swinging down in front of the heiress a fraction of a second before his heavy boot would have connected with her head. Instead, Antoni kicked Ladybug, who was crouched down in front of Chloe, right in the side, a series of sickening _crack_ s echoing around in her head. Was that real? Did he really…?

"Fuck, shit," the older man stumbled back upon seeing Paris' hero crouched in front of him, wheezing in pain. "Ladybug, I never meant to—"

"I'll fucking _kill_ you if you hurt so much as a fly," Ladybug growled, standing up and allowing her growing pain to add to her fierce scowl. "Do you understand?"

Antoni opened and closed his mouth like a dying fish, eyes just as glassy as one. "I- I- I—"

"Go!" Ladybug boomed, planting her hands on his chest and pushing him back, hard. Harder than she'd pushed Adrien. Harder than she'd pushed another person in her entire life. She almost wondered if this monster counted as a person.

Antoni flew back into the brick wall, slamming into it hard and crumpling to the ground. Without allowing himself to catch his bearings, he got up and stumbled out of the alleyway as quickly as possible with what looked to be a nasty concussion. _Good_.

"L- L- Ladybug," Chloe breathed the heroine's name, drawing her attention down to the blonde. "You saved me. Marinette…you _saved_ me. Thank you."

Ladybug nodded tightly, pressing her hand to her side and applying pressure. "I was supposed to be meeting Chat. Go home. Lock your doors, and lose that creep's number. We'll talk tomorrow."

Chloe pursed her lips, contemplating her next words as if she had a hundred things she wanted to say. "Ok," she breathed out, "ok. Thank you."

And with that, Chloe was gone, running hard down the illuminated street. Ladybug let her poised demeanor fall, curling in on her injured left side and whimpering in pain. She did the only thing she could think to in the moment, hands flying to her yo-yo and pressing the communication button.

"Hey Lady, what's taking you so—" Chat began.

"Help," Ladybug interjected, pressing a button that would send him her location. "Ribs. Lots of pain. Might pass out." Her words were clipped and taught with worry, panic creeping into the corners of her vision.

"Holy _shit_ , I'll be right there."

Ladybug lowered herself to the ground, leaning against one of the grimy brick walls. She tried to steady her breathing, but before she could, the ever-present aching in her bones intensified, mixing with the pain of her most-likely broken ribs. Within seconds, her world turned to black, the outside scenery falling from her grasp.

* * *

"—dybug? Ladybug!"

Someone was calling Ladybug's name. Marinette's pseudonym. That was the only reason she woke so quickly, panic inflating in her chest like an overfilled balloon.

"Shit!" Ladybug hissed, her eyes flying open and straining hard against the light above her. Obscuring most of the light, the streetlight, she now realized, was Chat, who was biting his lip so hard, it had started to bleed.

"Ladybug," he sighed out in relief, placing a gloved hand on her face and rubbing soothing circles with his thumb. "You're ok."

"Where am I?" She tried to sit up, but the pain in her left side stopped her. "What happened?"

"You don't remember?"

Ladybug took a few moments to contemplate his question. In a sudden flash, the memory of what had happened crashed against her head. Chloe. Antoni. Her ribs. _Holy shit_. That was real. _This_ was real.

"I do. I was saving a- a civilian. Her abusive piece of shit boyfriend tried to kick her in the head—"

"What the actual fuck—!"

"My thoughts exactly," Ladybug chuckled the words lightly, a coping mechanism she'd picked up since becoming Ladybug. Chat didn't so much as send her a questioning look — he was well aware of how she coped. "I intervened, and he kicked me in the damn ribs. Fuck, this shit hurts."

Chat closed his eyes and exhaled deeply, his minty breath falling onto her face. Wintergreen, with a hint of spearmint. "Why didn't you pull him out of the way? Was it really that…that close? That bad?"

Ladybug nodded slowly. "I didn't know what else to do. The alleyway was too small to pull someone away, and I…"

Chat furrowed his brows when she trailed off without finishing. "Yes?"

"I'm getting weaker," Ladybug admitted, closing her eyes and letting the built up tears escape. "I can hardly lift my own body weight, and that's with the suit affecting my gravity. Another person…I just can't anymore."

Chat's eyes hardened, his bloodied lower lip trembling as he took in a shaking breath. "I'm going to kill him. He should be going through this shit, not you."

"Chat, we—"

"No!" Chat spat, looking away from her now. "He's _killing_ you. This isn't ok. He needs to die if that's what it's going to take."

"But we don't know if that's what it's going to take," Ladybug interjected, drawing Chat's attention towards her own. "What if we can end this without anyone dying?"

"And what if we can't?"

"Chat."

"What?"

Ladybug took a shaky breath in, holding it for a moment before breathing it out carefully. "We have to try. Please. If it's really…if we really can't figure this out without Hawkmoth dying, then I'll be by your side. It's just…" Ladybug trailed off, mind catching on how heavily she had reacted earlier that day, even without an Akuma attack.

"What is it?" Chat's genuine curiosity was evident in his voice.

"I don't know if Hawkmoth is the only one behind this. Or if he's even behind it at all," Ladybug explained, her uncertainty tugging at the pit of her stomach. "What if he's not even involved? We can't kill him…and…and find out later that he was innocent."

"No matter what," Chat said, voice tight, "that bastard isn't innocent. He's hurt so many people."

"Still. There has to be another way."

"Ladybug, what do you mean when you said Hawkmoth might not be behind this? How could he _not_ be?"

"Earlier today…" Ladybug contemplated whether or not to tell him, though she did eventually explain how she was sick without an Akuma causing it. "There hadn't been one in _days_ ," she finished, closing her leaking eyes and huffing out a small breath. "What if it's not him causing this?"

There was a long pause, Chat's breaths falling quicker and sharper onto her face. When she finally opened her eyes, she caught a glimpse at the tears in his. "What is it, then?" he asked before Ladybug could comment.

"I wish I knew."

* * *

It was midnight by the time Marinette got back to her room, Chat having bandaged her up and set her broken ribs, whatever he'd wanted to talk about before completely forgotten. Usually, they would be healed at that point, especially with the Ladybug suit helping her out, but upon examining them before bed, she noted that they were still bruised black, green, and yellow on the edges. She was about to talk to Tikki about it when she realized she couldn't find her Kwamii.

"Tikki?" her voice was a whisper, but Tikki's ears were far better than any other existing creature. Marinette could have sworn she had been with her when she'd gotten back, but now she was gone. It was like she'd vanished into thin air from her resting spot on Marinette's pillow. "Tikki!"

Again, there was no response, the silence deafening as painful tears dripped down her face. Wiping them away, she hardly even noticed their inky black nature in her grief.

"Tikki…where are you?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all! What do you think?
> 
> I know, I know, I posted on Christmas and then forgot to post this weekend. I totally forgot until this morning, lol. I hope this extra dramatic chapter makes up for it, though!
> 
> That being said, how does everyone feel about the recent developments? Let me know in the comments! I'm continuously amazed at the reception this story gets, so thank you all so so much!
> 
> Until Sunday,
> 
> ~Ashtyn


	11. Nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hawkmoth is a little ooc, but bear with me, y'all

**Flutter**

_Chapter 11_

_Nightmare_

The nightmares started that night. She's had nightmares before, sure, but nothing like _this_. This was something completely different. This was unmanageable.

The first one began with Marinette standing on top of water, in the middle of an ocean that seemed to stretch on forever. The aching pain was gone from her body, but it had been replaced by excruciating grief.

"Tikki! Tikki, where are you?!" she yelled at the top of her lungs, breath coming in strangled gasps. "Please, I can't be Ladybug without you!"

As soon as she said the last word, the tension underneath her ceased, dropping her into the dark blue waters. She tried to swim up, but she was being pulled, dragged towards the bottom of this infinite body of water. Just as the air in her lungs turned completely stale, she broke through another wave of tension, falling through air and landing painfully at the bottom of a cave. The air above her was held in by a massive bubble, the water swirling darkly against the barrier. The cave was dimly lit with light blue crystals, the walls and floors all a cold dark grey color.

"Hello?" Marinette asked, finally making her way to her feet. The pain receded as soon as it had appeared, leaving her once again with that sinking feeling of dread. "Where am I?"

"You're in my dream, Ladybug." It was Hawkmoth's voice — deep and growling and bitter. Marinette turned around, though she couldn't find him. It was if the sound had come from the walls.

"What do you want?" she hissed, taking up a fighting stance and readying herself for yet another battle. Instead, the crystals glowed brighter, illuminating the faint drawing carved into the cave walls. Letting herself relax a bit, she edged towards the nearest one, gasping upon realizing it was an image of her. The artwork was immaculate, each stroke purposeful and intricately intertwined with the others. "What is this?"

"It's you."

"No duh. Why?" Marinette retorted shortly, foot tapping quickly. She was growing impatient with every growing moment, the dread in the pit of her stomach slowly being replaced by anger.

"A prophecy. I stumbled upon it a few days ago. I never realized I was fighting a _child_ ," Hawkmoth's tone was a strange mix of frustration, pity, and guilt. "I would have never hurt you if I'd known."

"Ok, so then make it _stop_!" Marinette yelled at the ceiling, wincing when the crystals flickered brighter for half a second.

"I'm not the one poisoning you, Marinette."

She stumbled back at that, holding a cold hand to her forehead. She had been right. It wasn't really Hawkmoth. "How am I supposed to trust that you're telling the truth?" she asked, despite knowing that he wasn't lying.

"I know you've already figured out that it isn't me. I felt your anger shift away from me," Hawkmoth's voice explained, the frustration falling away.

"Wait a second, _felt_ it? What do you mean?"

"You haven't realized it yet," Hawkmoth sighed the words, as if disappointed in her. "I suppose you don't have as much life experience as myself, but I still thought you'd put the pieces together. We're bonded, Ladybug — every time you purify an Akuma, it strengthens that bond. We're completely intertwined, now."

Again, Marinette stumbled back, this time catching a rock with her foot and falling on her butt. "That's impossible."

"Look deeply within yourself, Marinette." His words turned almost comforting. It almost reminded her of her father for a moment.

Marinette did as she was told, stiffening upon realizing he was right. She could feel his presence within her — the same presence she felt when he spoke through his Akumas. He was telling the truth. He had to be. There was no other explanation.

"If you're not poisoning me…you must be affected, too," Marinette gasped the words, the realization hitting her like a ton of bricks.

"Not nearly as much as you, no. But I can feel it. It's been weakening me."

Marinette shuddered, placing a hand on her racing heart, still sitting on the ground. "What's going on, then? What's happening to me? To…to us?"

Hawkmoth paused for a few moments, contemplating his next sentence. "I don't quite know. It could be a number of things, or beings. I've been trying to narrow it down since I found out who you are."

Marinette opened her mouth to speak, but before she could, a tugging sensation wrenched in her gut, pulling her towards the ground. A strangled scream escaped her lips, Hawkmoth trying to speak to her, but falling deaf on her panicked ears. After a few moments, she fell through the cave floor, being pulled into complete darkness. All around her, she could feel the anger and rage writing around. It reminded her painfully of the poison.

"My dear girl," the voice that spoke was quiet and modulated to be deeper than humanly possible. The tone resembled that of a broken lawnmower. "You're getting close to the truth, aren't you?"

"Who are you?" Marinette took a deep breath in, still engulfed in the darkness. " _What_ are you?"

"I'm your worst nightmare, my dear. No worries, all will be revealed soon enough," she could hear the smile in its voice.

"What? No!" Marinette sat up in bed, the darkness melting away and leaving her back in reality, chest heaving and hair wet with cold sweat.

* * *

Marinette stayed home from school that day. It wasn't hard to fake an illness — she was already severely ill due to _whatever_ poison was coursing through her. She tried for hours to figure out what to do, how to become Ladybug without Tikki, who Hawkmoth was. More than anything, she worked hard to figure out who — or what — was poisoning her. She didn't have a clue. It was supposed to be Hawkmoth. For so long, she was _convinced_ it had to be Hawkmoth.

"Tikki," Marinette stared at the ceiling around 5pm, eyes stinging wildly as she caught black tears with a wad of tissue, "what do I do? Where did you go?"

Again, there was no response. She wasn't really expecting one, at that point. Before she could continue, her phone went off, causing the bluenette to wince upon realizing it was Chloe's number.

"What?" her tone was sharper then she'd meant for it to be.

"Jeez, chill, Mari. I'm just downstairs in the bakery. Can you tell your parents to let me up? They don't believe we're on good terms," Chloe explained, Marinette's parents talking audibly in the background.

"Give one of them the phone," Marinette sighed, leaning back and letting her head rest on the stack of pillows behind her. There was a series of shuffling sounds, and then the phone was in her mother's hands.

"Marinette? Chloe says she has your assignments. Do you really want to see her?"

"Yes, mama. We…we're friends now. You can let her up."

Her mother didn't sound convinced, but agreed anyways, Marinette hanging up the phone before Chloe could be put back on. A few moments later, Chloe was walking up to her bed, a stack of papers tucked under her right arm.

"Let me guess," Marinette smirked the words, "you didn't just come here to give me the assignments?"

"You look like hell," Chloe hissed, setting the papers down and running to Marinette's bathroom, returning shortly with a wet, cold cloth.

"Thanks, I just got back."

"Ok, Veronica Sawyer, cut the crap. Why did you skip today?" Chloe's voice was tight, but also…something else. If Marinette didn't know better, she'd guess the heiress was concerned about her. _Huh_.

Marinette reluctantly explained her dream from the night before, going on to elaborate on her fruitless search for Hawkmoth and the strange entity during the day.

"Shit, this isn't good. You can't become Ladybug?" Chloe asked, responding to the part about Tikki disappearing first.

"No, I don't know how to do it without her. I've been trying all day."

"Fuck, Marinette, what are we going to do?"

"We?" confusion painted her tone, brows furrowing. " _You_ don't have to do a thing. This is _my_ problem."

"Jeez, you're so stubborn!" Chloe's hands flew up as she spoke, frustration and concern carrying the edge in her voice. "This is _our_ problem now, ok? Nino would be here, but he's keeping an eye on Alya. She's a wreck. Still, it's us three against the world, ok?"

Marinette started to tear up against her will, wiping away (thankfully) clear tears. "Why would you say that?"

"Because it's true."

At that point, the tears began to fall faster, thick streams of hot, salty liquid dripping down to the corner of her lips and her chin. Chloe was in bed with her in a moment, hugging her tightly and pulling her head into her shoulder. Before she could argue, Marinette was sobbing into the blonde's figure, shaking all the while.

"I can't do this. Not without Tikki. Not without Chat. Not without Alya. Fuck fuck fuck, Chloe how am I supposed to do this?"

"Nino and I are with you. And you can still talk to Chat," Chloe cooed into Marinette's rat's-nest hair. "You can make a mask. Or I can buy one. Meet him where you normally do, and explain everything that's happened."

"I thought you didn't trust him," Marinette sobbed, causing Chloe to tense up against her.

"I've had a change of heart. You two are _heroes_. If it was him…if it was him who had found me last night…I know he would've saved me, too. I understand now."

Marinette pulled away, pursing her lips upon realizing that Chloe was crying now, too. "I'm so sorry he did that," Marinette growled. "That piece of shit human would be dead if I wasn't so fucked up right now."

Chloe let out a low, bitter laugh. "I think it's _because_ you're so fucked up you're even thinking like that. You're no killer, Marinette."

Right then was when it hit her — Chloe hadn't called her Ladybug at all since she'd arrived. A small smile graced her lips, Chloe returning it quickly. "You're right. We're not killers. Oh boy, do I really need to talk to Chat."

"Ok," Chloe stood up, holding out a hand to help Marinette out of bed. "Let's get you ready, then."

Without any reluctance this time, Marinette took her hand, letting her help her out of bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all! What do you think?
> 
> I know, I know - Hawkmoth is a little out of character, but bear with me. In my mind, he really does love Adrien, and when he finds out Ladybug is his age, he has a bit of a change of heart. Like he wants to protect her.
> 
> That being said, what does everyone think about these developments? Where do you think this is going, if you had to guess? Let me know in the comments!
> 
> Until Tuesday,
> 
> ~Ashtyn


	12. Suffocate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ok so get ready for some real intense shit - and a tiny bit of an expo drop. But! It really ties everything together, or at least starts to. Enjoy!

**Flutter**

_Chapter 12_

_Suffocate_

"Chat?" Marinette called out, standing at the base of the Eiffel Tower. She knew he hung around there on Thursdays. Shit, it was only _Thursday_. The week just seemed to drag on. "Chat Noir! It's me, Ladybug!"

"Bugaboo, what's with the change of costume?" Chat dropped down with the help of his baton behind her, causing the bluenette to spin around in haste. He eyed her over, examining the black long sleeved turtle neck, gloves, and leggings. She was wearing a pair of flat, black leather boots she'd made a few months prior just to see if she could. The black mask she'd put together was pressed against her face, covering the skin around her eyes and nose.

"I can't find Tikki," the words were breathed out in impatience, her foot tapping hastily as she crossed her arms in front of her.

"What's a 'Tikki'?"

"My _Kwamii_ ," Ladybug hissed, looking down and wiping the tears from her eyes in an attempt to keep herself together. It wasn't working very well. "She…last night, after you patched me up, she disappeared. I can't find her."

"Ladybug," Chat's voice was light as a feather, drawing her attention up to his. He had tears sparking in his own eyes, sparkling green behind his tinted mask. "Are you ok? Are you…can you still heal?"

Wordlessly, Ladybug lifted her shirt, displaying the yellow and green bruise to her partner. "It was black yesterday. Something's speeding it up."

"Good," Chat breathed the word out, hand coming instinctively to her side and brushing lightly against the discolored skin. "Good."

Ladybug watched him, mouth agape as he brushed his clawed, gloved hand gently against her side. Before she could control herself, she found her eyes lingering on his lips, pursed in a mix of frustration and concentration. His hair was a mess, his eyes wide and full of tender care. He was beautiful. Completely beautiful. She took a step towards him, and Chat lightly gripped her hip, just below the bruise. He kept his gaze on her exposed skin, breath hitching in his throat.

"Ladybug."

"Chat."

They didn't say anything else, Chat's eyes meeting her own. His gaze flickered down to her lips before meeting her eyes once more. Pulling her closer, their faces rested just an inch or two away from each others'. Ladybug got on her toes, bringing their flushed faces together and nearly pressing her lips to his.

"Lady," Chat sighed, turning away and letting go of her left hip. "We can't do this. There's something wrong with you. We should be focusing on that."

Ladybug nodded slowly, taking a few steps back and shivering at the lack of warmth on her hip. "You're right. Does that have anything to do with what you needed to talk about yesterday?"

Chat looked back at her, ears pinning themselves back against his head. "No, that's something else. I- I'm concerned about a classmate of mine. She…something's happening with the Akuma attacks. I think she might have been infected somehow, like you were."

Ladybug stared at him in silent shock, fiddling with her gloved hands absently. "How do you mean?"

"I…I don't know how to explain it," Chat huffed, beginning to pace in front of her. "She's been angry, and scared, and she looks sicker then hell. She's…I don't know, keeping secrets, I think." He met her eyes now, holding the contact in determination. "Something's seriously wrong. And it has to be connected to what's happening to you."

* * *

Marinette didn't have a very good memory of what happened after Chat explained the situation. Her theory was that she was so stressed and overwhelmed, she partially dissociated to keep from overreacting. While the reaction helped keep Chat centered and focused on the problem at hand, it also meant that Marinette had an immediate panic attack upon getting back to her room.

"Fuck!" Marinette threw her pillow against the wall, watching it bounce off soundlessly. She had somehow managed to get her breathing under control, though her slight asthma was triggered to the point of a closed up throat. She rushed to the bathroom, grabbing her blue albuterol inhaler and taking two puffs. After a minute or so, her breathing was fully regulated, allowing her to lie down on her bed and sob silently. "Shit…"

This was _not_ good. Not at _all_. Chat was on to her. He must have been in her class, that was the only explanation. Every time she tried to think of who he might be, her mind grew increasingly fuzzy and achy — a side effect of the Miraculous' obscuring spell. With a long sigh, Marinette flipped onto her uninjured right side, hugging her pillow tightly to her chest.

"Goodnight, Tikki," Marinette whimpered to the missing Kwamii before shutting off her bedside lamp, and subsequently her consciousness.

* * *

The nightmare Marinette had that night is, to this day, the one she regards as her single worst. Strangely enough, it started out as a rather pleasant dream, Tikki floating a few feet away from her as they were both bathed in an almost blinding, warm light.

"Tikki!" Marinette called out, pushing herself forward and letting Tikki settle into her hands.

"Marinette," Tikki cooed, nuzzling into the heroine's hands gently. "I don't have much time — it's taking all of my energy to be here at all."

"Ok," Marinette breathed out gently, looking intently at the Kwamii in her hands. "What is it?"

"You're right," Tikki said the words with so much conviction, Marinette couldn't help but believe them. "It isn't Hawkmoth. Your dream last night was _real_. That was _really_ Hawkmoth."

"Then what is it? What's poisoning me?"

Tikki paused, as if she didn't want to say what she was about to. "They're an ancient evil. One Plagg and I thought was eradicated long ago."

"Why is it targeting _me_ , then?"

"It's a Kwamii Eater, Marinette."

The words sent a stiffening chill up her spine, her eyes going wide at her Kwamii. "Tikki—"

"I've managed to preserve myself by retreating into your body, but listen, Marinette—"

Just as Tikki was going to continue, Marinette felt a shiver of pure terror wash over her. Tikki noticed, flying up to her face and placing a single hand on her left cheek.

"It's coming. I'm so sorry, but you're going to have to make it through this," Tikki cooed lightly.

"But- what- what's going—"

"You'll know soon enough," Tikki looked so sad as she spoke, it was hard not to comfort _her_ , despite the situation being the other way around. "Just remember, I'm here with you. You're still Ladybug, no matter what."

"But how do I transform if you aren't—" Marinette began, being promptly cut off by a searing pain in her lungs. Suddenly, the warm light washed away, replaced by inky black darkness. The darkness washed Tikki's image away, though Marinette could still feel her, deep within herself, as promised.

Marinette stumbled back into the infinite darkness, the pain in her lungs intensifying. She tried desperately to suck in a breath, but realized with a start that she wasn't able. She couldn't breathe. She was _suffocating_.

"Help— me—" she croaked out, and the darkness snickered at her, growing somehow darker and more intense.

"Young Ladybug, don't worry," it spoke in its distorted, broken voice.

"St- st- stop!" Marinette clawed in desperation at her throat, her senses burning and crying for oxygen. She couldn't _breathe_!

"He'll be gone soon enough," the thing around her cooed. "And soon, all but you will be, too."

"Kwamii— Eater—"

"Smart girl."

"What— want— me— for—?" Marinette's words were more strangled gasps at this point.

"Darling," that broken machine voice tried to sound comforting, "you're going to _become_ me."

At that point, Marinette's vision was a mess of white stars and black, inky blotches. Out of the blotches, a figure formed — an eight legged figure with two red triangles, points touching, on its thorax.

"Black Widow," the thing hissed its rancid laugh at her, poisoning Marinette's mind further. "Call me Black Widow, darling."

With that, Marinette gasped in a painful breath of air, sitting upright in her bed. The light from the window burned her eyes, the spider's body etched into her vision as she closed her eyes tightly. She could feel the poison resting on her skin, but it didn't sting anymore. As the oxygen returned to her lungs, she realized that it almost felt _good_.

"What…" Marinette gasped aloud, "what am I turning into?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!!! I've waited so long to get this point and to explain things a little further!!! Did I lie in the story summary to build suspense and aid in a plot twist? Maaaaaaaybeeeeeee ;) Did it make the surprise all the more satisfying? Oh definitely!
> 
> That being said, what do you think happened to Hawkmoth? With this new info, where do y'all think the story is going? I love hearing from all of you, and I make sure to reply to every comment, so please let me know!
> 
> Can't wait to show you what else I've got up my sleeve <3
> 
> Until Sunday,
> 
> ~Ashtyn


	13. Kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So sorry it's late, but here you go! Have some traumatized teens :) and stay tuned for an important message in the author notes

**Flutter**

_Chapter 13_

_Kiss_

Friday was finally here, and Marinette couldn't be more grateful. She put on too much concealer and color corrector to make herself look somewhat alive, and headed out to school. Chloe and Nino met her at the bakery's entrance, walking with her and cracking half-hearted puns. Marinette managed a few feigned giggles, obviously not fooling her friends. _Friends_. Chloe and Nino were her only friends at the moment. Well, and Chat Noir, though their relationship gave her a headache at the moment.

While they were walking down an unoccupied street, Marinette explained her recent dreams, telling them everything she knew. A part of her was nervous to tell Chloe, though she pushed past that. Chloe trusted her implicitly. Maybe it was ok to return the sentiment.

"So…was it Hawkmoth that was suffocated last night?" Chloe asked, igniting a flame of realization in Marinette's stomach.

"Shit. Probably."

"Ok," Nino sighed, taking off his glasses and rubbing his eyes before placing them back on his head, "so what now? Hawkmoth isn't dead, right?"

Marinette pursed her lips, a million possible answers to his question swimming in her head. Was he really dead? Was he just attacked? She couldn't quite figure it out, which just made her head hurt even more. "I don't know."

"He has to be, right? The Kwamii Eater — Black Widow — said _'he'd be gone'_ or whatever," Chloe thought out loud, moving her hands hurriedly as she spoke. "If it wasn't talking about Hawkmoth, then who _was_ it talking about?"

With a shiver, Marinette had a horrible realization, her feet turning to cement as she stopped walking. Chloe and Nino stopped next to her, sending her questioning glances. "Chat," Marinette breathed her partner's name. "Chat! Shit!"

"Oh _fuck_ ," Nino hissed, his hands flying up behind his neck. "Can you check on him? Shit, this could be _bad_!"

"You don't think I know that?" Marinette growled in response, tossing her backpack at a stunned Chloe and running around the corner into an empty alleyway.

"Please work, please _please_ work!" Marinette hyperventilated the words, each gasp for air sending a new volley of frustration across her body. "Tikki, transform me!"

Immediately, Marinette could feel the transformation wash over her, accompanied by temporary relief. As soon as she was in her Ladybug form, she checked her yo-yo, the relief becoming permanent upon seeing a message from Chat. From _this morning_.

_Ladybug, I need you. Please find me when you have the time. ~Chat Noir_

Ladybug stared down at the message, looking at the time reluctantly. She couldn't miss another day of school. She'd have to talk to him after.

She typed out a quick response before hastily de-transforming. As soon as Ladybug's strength ebbed from her bones, she stumbled out of the alleyway, right into Nino's arms.

"Woah, Mari, watch out," he chuckled — a tight, forced sound obviously used to cope. "Did you find out…?"

"He's ok," Marinette sighed, using Nino as a crutch to get herself upright. Chloe handed her backpack back with shaking hands, her face pale as a sheet.

"Then who died?" Chloe whispered the question, voice shaking ever so slightly.

"I…" Marinette closed her eyes, shouldering her backpack. "I don't know."

* * *

The first thing that struck Marinette as she walked into homeroom was the tense, mournful mood lingering in the air. The poison within her writhed in glee, though she pushed that down.

"What's going on?" Marinette whispered to her friends, who both shrugged in ignorance.

"Haven't you heard?" Alya snapped from her new seat in the front row, eyeing Marinette with red-rimmed eyes. "Gabriel Agreste is _dead_."

Marinette stumbled back, the poison almost bringing a rancid laugh to trembling lips. Nino and Chloe caught her by her elbows before she could fall over, their own hands clammy with the news. "What?" Marinette couldn't figure out which of the trio spoke.

"Adrien...he's staying home. For a while, probably," Alya's tone was a knife against Marinette's frayed nerves. "If you even care, that is."

Marinette managed to ground her feet, standing without the help of Chloe and Nino now. Alya looked directly into her eyes, gaze softening ever so slightly, as if she recognized the weakness in her. "He's really dead," Marinette but back a shuddering sob. This wasn't supposed to be happening. This was _bad_. Poor Adrien.

"You can bring him his homework tonight," Alya sighed reluctantly, eyes clouding in pity before she looked away. "My mom wants me home right away, anyways. He'll be expecting _me_ , but it's fine."

Marinette nodded, taking her seat shakily behind her former best friend. She laid her head in her crossed arms, shaking while Nino rubbed soothing circles in her back. This was _bad_.

* * *

When Marinette approached the Agreste mansion, her heart instinctively hammered against her ribs. In spite of her resolve to leave romance behind her, she still had a crush on Adrien. A part of her wondered if it would ever truly go away.

Steeling her frazzled nerves, she pressed the ring button, startling when the doors opened almost immediately. They must have been expecting her.

Marinette silently made her way up to Adrien's room, shuddering at the desolate state the mansion was in. Where were the staff? Where was the usual hustle and bustle of the manor? It was a chilling desert where once there was an oasis.

"Come in, Mari," Adrien called through the door before Marinette could knock. Gulping and readjusting Adrien's work in her arms, she opened the door slowly, eyes catching on Adrien. She almost dropped his things, biting back a gasped breath at his current state.

The model was in a pair of sweatpants. _Just_ a pair of sweatpants. His chest was partially covered by the comforter draped lazily over his midriff and pelvic area. His hair was a mess — it almost reminded the heroine of her partner's for a moment — and his eyes were rimmed a bright red, making his verdant irises pop. Marinette could see where the tears had fallen, as they left shining tracks down his cheeks. His head was pressed into a pile of cushy pillows, his neck craned to look away from the door and towards the wall of windows.

"Adrien," Marinette set his things down on his desk before sitting on the bed next to him. "Adrien, are you ok?"

He let out a bitter laugh, finally turning to face her with broken eyes. "What do you think?"

Marinette swallowed hard, biting a shaking lower lip. "I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry. I wish I'd been there for you. I wish…I wish things were different. I'm sorry."

Adrien nodded, closing his eyes and letting a few more tears fall. "Shit, Mari, I'm not mad at you anymore. How can I be? When…when you could die any moment."

Marinette stiffened, causing him to open his eyes and push himself up to his elbows. "Die? Why- why would you say that?"

"Anyone could die," he answered reluctantly, studying his classmate with withering eyes. "At anytime, anyone could die. I know that now after Gabriel…after father—" his voice caught on the last word, more tears streaming down to his chin. Marinette moved out of instinct, wrapping her arms around him and pulling him close. Adrien sobbed into her hair, arms hugging her tightly in return.

"Shh, it's ok. I'm so sorry. It'll be ok I promise," Marinette cooed into his right ear, running gentle fingers through golden locks.

"He's gone!" Adrien lamented, breaths wracking painfully against his entire body. "Gone! I never- I should have- he never said it though but I wish- I wish he knew how much I- how much I—"

"It's ok," Marinette's words were light as she interrupted him. "I've got you. Let it out."

As if her words were a command, Adrien let out another wet sob, his words tangled into it. "I love him! I love him so much and I never told him!"

Marinette hummed lightly, her fingers traversing down his neck and coming behind his back. She pressed herself further into him, sighing sadly when he did the same. She'd been a bad friend lately. This was the least she could do to make up for it.

"He knows. I know it." She didn't know how, but she could feel the truth in her words from the pit of her stomach. Gabriel really _did_ love his son, even if he hadn't shown it much at all.

Adrien pulled back suddenly, wiping his tears away on the back of his left forearm. He looked into Marinette's eyes, gaze flickering down to her lips hastily. Then, he did the last thing Marinette expected him to do.

He kissed her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all! What do you think?
> 
> First of all, I just wanted to make an announcement - because I'm basically caught up to how many chapters I've written as far as posting goes, I have to cut back to posting once a week to be able to keep up. So! I'll be posting every Saturday, starting this upcoming Saturday :)
> 
> That being said, how do y'all like the update?! And before anyone says it's out of character, please know that these kids are traumatized, and people don't act like themselves when they're traumatized - I can tell you that from personal experience. So! Get ready for some ooc moments!!!
> 
> Until Saturday,
> 
> ~Ashtyn


	14. After

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Get ready, things are going off the rail, and shit is getting complicated :D

**Flutter**

_Chapter 14_

_After_

Adrien's lips were burning against Marinette. _Adrien_. She had a hard time believing her senses, though when he deepened the kiss, she let that part of herself go, kissing him back. His breath tasted like wintergreen and spearmint, as if he'd just brushed or had been chewing gum. His arms grabbed desperately at her hips, pulling her onto his own hips, her legs straddling his midriff, where the comforter had since fallen. Adrien pressed himself further yet into Marinette, hands now tugging at the hairs on the back of her neck. She groaned into his mouth, head tilting back and breaking the kiss as he tugged her pigtails out.

Adrien looked at her with hungry eyes, smirking devilishly and kissing gently at her jaw. Marinette whimpered, keeping her head back as Adrien continued to trail light, wet pecks down her neck. Choosing a spot near her right collarbone, Adrien latched on, teeth grabbing at hot skin and _sucking_. Marinette moaned, her head falling against Adrien's as her rapid breath fell into his hair. Adrien let go of her tender skin, eyes gazing at her from under his rat's nest hair.

"You're an amazing distraction," Adrien growled, a hint of a smile lingering in his tone.

Maybe, things would have gone differently if Marinette hadn't been infected with the poison. If she wasn't already impulsive and out of control of her emotions before stepping into the lion's den. Maybe she could have reassessed the situation and acted rationally, but all rationale had drained from her body the moment his lips met her's. So she did what her body yearned for. She kissed him back. _Hard_. And with intent.

* * *

Marinette awoke surrounded by warmth. She wasn't used to that, though she wasn't complaining, either. Her eyes fluttered open slowly, meeting curious green ones as soon as her vision adjusted to the waning, sunset light.

"Adrien," she sighed, sinking into his grasp on her bare skin. After a few moments, the reality of the situation hit her. Yelping and pushing herself back, Marinette stared at the model with the eyes of a wild animal. "Adrien!?"

"Evening, beautiful," he purred, smirking at her frazzled state. Marinette glanced under the covers quickly, eyes jerking back up hastily upon realizing that they were moth completely naked.

"I- I- I didn't mean- you're so- I—" Marinette stuttered out, looking anywhere but at his hungry eyes.

"Hey, Mari," he grabbed her chin gently, bringing her gaze towards his own, "it's fine. You didn't take advantage of me. You're ok."

Marinette nodded slowly, letting his almost hypnotic gaze soothe her. "Ok. Good."

Adrien let go of her chin, brushing a few stray strands of hair out of her face and smiling softly at her. "Well, that was fun," he sighed. She couldn't help the giggle that escaped her gaping lips, though Adrien seemed to pick up immediately on its forced, coping nature. "What is it? What's wrong?"

Marinette grabbed a bundle of blankets and carefully wrapped them around her body, leaving two fleece blankets for Adrien to cover himself with. How many blankets did this guy _need_? "I just…didn't mean for this to happen…"

"Hey, me neither," Adrien got up, wrapping a blanket around his own waist. "I mean, we've been fighting anyways lately, and…I mean, after you pushed me, I thought we'd never talk again. I guess that's when I realized how much I'd miss you…as more than a friend…"

Marinette felt her cheeks redden deeper than they were already, clearing her throat and bending down carefully to retrieve her discarded clothes. "Let me get dressed, then we can talk about this, ok?"

"Sure," Marinette didn't have to look at him to know he was smiling — the smirk was evident in his voice.

Sweeping into the connecting bathroom, she gently closed the door and got dressed, noting that the clock next to the mirror ready 6pm. Good. She'd still have time to meet up with Chat that night. Upon stepping out of the bathroom, Marinette caught Adrien just as he was pulling a light orange t-shirt over his messy hair. She blushed at the sight of his chiseled abs. She should have _known_ what he would look like shirtless. The images were plastered all over Paris, after all. A part of her always assumed it must be airbrushed, or photoshopped or something. She would have never guessed that he _really_ looked like _that_.

"Done," her voice was hardly a squeak. Adrien turned back to her, adjusting his shirt and offering her a sad smile.

"How are you feeling? I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable or anything…"

"No!" Marinette nearly yelled, causing the model to smirk slyly at her. "I mean," she cleared her throat, "no, no it's ok. I just…I don't know…I've wanted to do that for…a while now…"

"Me too," Adrien swept towards her as he spoke, standing just half a foot away and brushing stray strands of hair out of her face. "I'm sorry it took me so long to realize. But now…Mari, we can figure out what's going on with you. Maybe this will help."

Marinette furrowed her brows, cocking her head and taking a tiny step back. "Wh…what do you mean?"

"I know you're caught up with the Akumas, somehow," Adrien surged forward once more, hands raising to wrap around her face. Marinette swatted them away, feeling the poisonous entity within her writhe in displeasure and power. "Please, Marinette, let me help you fight Hawkmoth. I know someone who can—"

"Stop," Marinette hissed, taking three long steps back and pulling the hair out of her face and into a loose, messy bun. "You don't know what you're talking about."

"Whatever spell you're under, I can help!" Adrien surged forward, but Marinette's right hand shot out to stop him by pressing against his shoulder. "Whatever happened earlier today might have helped, I—"

"Are you telling me you thought you'd _fuck_ the Akuma out of me?" Marinette growled. Adrien's face went slack.

"That's not what I mea—"

"I know exactly what you meant," Marinette located her bag and shoes, slipping both on in haste before making her way over to the door.

"Wait, please!" Adrien called after her, but it was too late. She was already gone.

* * *

Ladybug found Chat Noir perched atop one of the corners of the Lourve. She yo-yoed her way up to him, landing behind him with a gentle _thud_.

"You've got your Kwamii back," Chat muttered, not bothering to so much as turn towards her. "Good. We'll need her."

"Chat, I got your message, what—" Ladybug began to speak, but as soon as Chat turned towards her, she stopped immediately. A small gasp fell from her lips.

Where her charming, cocky partner was supposed to be, there was a vacuum of disparity. His hair was messier, somehow, than usual. His eyes were a green-tinted shell of their former glory, his face stained with persistent tears.

"Chat," Ladybug sat down next to him as she spoke, both actions equally soft. She pulled him towards herself, pausing when he immediately flinched back before giving in. Chat Noir curled into Ladybug's side, sobbing and shaking against her small, sickly frame.

"I- he- I'm so sorry!" Chat sobbed, his voice echoing amongst the rooftops. "I'm sorry I'm sorry, I shouldn't be crying but I _am_ and I'm _sorry_."

"Shh," Ladybug cooed, smoothing his hair down with a gloved hand. "Let it out. There's no shame in that."

Chat did as he was told, hacking, shaking sobs wracking his entire body. In that moment, something snapped within Ladybug, the poison swimming in it — _reveling_ in it. Something or someone did this to him, and she swore that if it killed her, she would make that something _pay_. Her partner, her beautiful kitty cat, was in pain. He should never have had to be in such pain. Never.

When he finally slowed, Ladybug adjusted them so that his head was in her lap, fingers playing idly with his golden locks. Were they even real? She found herself wondering who he was under the mask, giving herself yet another headache.

"Who did this to you? What happened?" Ladybug asked, intensity seeping into her every word.

"I- I can't tell you. You'll find out..." Chat trailed off, not needing to continue. It was getting too close to his civilian life. That could be dangerous. _Deadly_. Especially now.

"That's fine," she lied through clenched teeth, "but when we get this all figured out, we lay the cards on the table. You tell me everything. Just...when things are less dangerous, understood?"

Chat lifted his head from her lap, resting on his left elbow and staring directly at her lips. In a quick moment, they both flew towards one another, lips locking in a heavy kiss. After a few heated moments, Chat pulled back, closing his eyes and breathing heavily.

"Shit. We can't do this."

"I know," Ladybug spoke as she drew closer, nearly planting her lips on his once more. Chat turned away, leaving her alone in her ever growing passion. The thing in the pit of her stomach seemed to growl against her annoyance.

"I had sex with a classmate today," he sighed, as if disappointed in himself. Marinette couldn't help the bitter laugh that fell from her lips, spurred by the twisted entity within her. "What?" Chat snapped at her reaction.

"I was just thinking about how…well, let's just say you and I are more similar than you think," Ladybug chuckled under her breath, swinging her legs as Chat took a seat next to her, fully upright now.

"What do you mean?"

"I had sex with a classmate today, too."

"Oh my god," Chat laughed, pure and hearty, just like he did when he was ok. In half a second, the laugh was gone, and all that was left was a shell of her partner. "What's wrong with us?"

"Trauma, trauma, and…let me see…more trauma?" Ladybug laughed at her own joke, deflating a bit when her partner didn't reciprocate. "It's ok. I'll take care of whatever did this to you."

"The same way I'm going to take care of whatever's doing this to you?" Chat asked, an edge of humor and anger hiding in his tone.

"Yeah," Ladybug sighed, closing her eyes and letting a few stinging, probably black, tears fall. "Like that."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all! What do you think?
> 
> I know, I know, these kids keep acting ooc! It's honestly the trauma, it messes with people! Anyone who questions it can talk to my therapist, lmao. Jkjk, but really, I'm basing this off of my own experiences, so I do kinda know what I'm talking about
> 
> Anyways, what do you think about the *~drama~*?! It's a lot, right! I'm so excited - we're closing in on the end here. Still a ways to go, but now that the tension has built, I'm really letting loose and things are hAppEnInG
> 
> Thank you so so much for understanding my need to take it a little slower lately - I'll try and get back to my regular posting schedule, but no promises. And thank you so so much for the amazing reception this story continues to get! It honestly means so so much!
> 
> Until Saturday,
> 
> ~Ashtyn


	15. Author’s Note

Hey all, Ashtyn here.

I just wanted to make a note on my most recent chapter - I will not be going more in depth as far as sex scenes go - I actually refuse to write them. Both on here and on ff.net I’ve gotten negative responses. I don’t quite know what to do. I’m going to tag the alluding to a sex scene, but I’m honestly pretty torn. I don’t know if I should just take down the chapter and re-write it?

This is all based off my own experience - I’ve done this kind of shit as a direct result of my trauma. It’s not cool, it’s out of the blue, it doesn’t make sense, and it happens. I’m sorry if I’ve offended anyone - I always try to respect others.

At this point, I haven’t written the next chapter, and with my PTSD flaring up and the negative reception, I honestly need to know whether or not people would like more. I’m sorry that this seems like fishing for compliments, it’s not, I just need to know whether it’s worth writing or not. If not, I’d much rather move on to the play I’ve been working on.

Thank you for your consideration, and sorry for any disrespect.

~Ashtyn


	16. Rapid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for everyone's ongoing support! I'm gonna keep posting, so enjoy the drama :)

**Flutter**

_Chapter 15_

_Rapid_

That night, Ladybug swung back to her balcony with about a million different thoughts racing through her mind. She was pissed. Correction — she was _beyond_ pissed, the fury within her bubbling over into the disgusting, gut-wrenching poison that had set up camp in her stomach. Someone hurt her kitty cat. Something hurt Chat Noir. She wouldn't tolerate it.

Chat — the one who protected no matter what the danger. Chat — the one who swore to _kill_ for her. Chat. _Her_ Chat.

Marinette — detransformed Marinette — threw a pillow at the wall, watching it soundlessly, unsatisfyingly bounce off. She let out a low, guttural growl as she picked up her lamp, throwing it at the wall. A satisfying _crunch_ echoed around her room. Satisfying, but not satisfying enough.

Marinette couldn't say exactly what, or how much, she threw around the room. All she could vouch for was the mess once her fit of rage was over, and the disturbed glint in her parents' eyes.

"Marinette!" her mother called to her through the poison's haze, finally catching the girl's attention.

"He's hurting!" Marinette turned to them, sobbing now and not caring if it was black. Hopefully they'd assume it was her makeup, like Adrien had.

"Honey, we know, but—"

"You don't know anything," Marinette grumbled, grabbing her purse with her phone in it and walking towards the balcony.

"Marinette!" her father called after her, but she was already scaling down the side of the building, gasping in the cold air as she touched the hard ground with bare feet. Without thinking, she started walking to a location vaguely in her memory, not even bothering to call.

* * *

Marinette shimmied her way up the side of the modest brick building. There were vines grown into the wall, which she tried to avoid as soon as she noticed the ones she touched beginning to wilt. Just another side effect, she guessed. _Perfect_. After a few moments of struggle, she pulled herself up to the window of the second story apartment. Upon getting to the window, Marinette peaked into the green painted room, her breath sucking itself in sharply.

Laying flat on Sabrina's bed was none other than Chloe, hair a mess around her. On top of her was Sabrina, legs straddling the blonde's hips, their lips pressed together in desperation. They pulled apart, looking at one another in a sort of beautiful wonder, cheeks flushed bright red. Marinette smiled, their innocence and pure delight palpable even through the closed window. Giving them one more moment to recover, she tapped on the window, causing the redhead to squeak loudly and roll onto the floor.

"L— Marinette?!" Chloe cried out, flying out of bed and to the window. Sh opened it in haste and helped Marinette in before smoothing her untidy clothes. "What the fuck? What are you doing here?!"

Marinette reached down and helped Sabrina off the ground, hero instincts still sharp as ever, somehow. The blushing redhead gazed in a strange mix of amusement, confusion, and jealousy. "Sorry to barge in like this."

"What," Chloe took a deep breath, pinching the bridge of her nose, "the fuck are you _doing here_?"

"I…" Marinette struggled with what to say in front of Sabrina, who was still staring holes into both of their heads. "I needed to talk to you."

"Since when do you two talk?" Sabrina snapped, drawing both of the other girls' attention towards her.

"Mari and I have come to…an agreement," Chloe poured a bit of resentment into her tone, an obvious play to ease Sabrina's growing suspicion.

"About what? Someone tell me what's going on!" Sabrina's voice raised before she could stop it, her blush deepening and hands covering her lips as soon as she realized she'd almost yelled.

"With everything with Alya, and, uh…" Chloe struggled to continue, shooting Marinette a pleading look.

"I had sex with Adrien," Marinette blurted, causing both Sabrina and Chloe to stare at her in pure shock. "And I, uh, couldn't go to Alya about it. I need to talk to Chloe about it. I figured she'd be here."

Three long seconds passed before anyone made a sound, Chloe finally breaking the silence by clearing her throat. "Uhm, so, wow. _Ok_. Ok."

"Holy _shit_!" Sabrina hissed, her hands tugging harshly at her bright red roots. Immediately, like she had seen it before, Chloe rushed over to her, taking the redhead's hands in her own.

"Hey, babe, you're gonna pull your hair out again."

"Babe?" Marinette asked suggestively, her eyebrows raising.

"Oh, shut it, model-fucker," Chloe snapped back, earning a short, quick chortle from Sabrina.

"Ok, yes, that's what I need to talk to you about. Can we talk? In private, please?" Marinette said through clenched teeth, fists just as tight.

"Sorry to kick you out of your room, honey, but…?" the blonde trailed off.

"Sure, I'll, uh, go play with the cat for a while. Get me when you're done?" Sabrina looked like she didn't know what else to say, too shy to argue. With a final huff, she turned and walked out her door, closing it behind her.

"Ok, so you could've come up with something else if you really needed to talk to—" Chloe began, pacing in front of Marinette.

"It wasn't an excuse," Marinette sighed, sinking down to sit on Sabrina's bed.

"Oh shit," Chloe's tone was shocked as she spoke, taking a seat next to the heroine. "Is that what you wanted to talk about?"

"No." Marinette explained what had happened with Chat earlier that night — how distraught he was, how badly she wanted to make his hurt go away. By the time she was finished, Chloe was looking at her with dark eyes, biting her lip as if she wanted to say something. "Tell me," Marinette demanded.

"Alya," Chloe breathed the name, causing Marinette to tense up. "She's got a lead on whatever that…that Akuma Eater is. She's close, and she knows it. I…I'm worried about her."

"You? Worried about _Alya_ , of all people?" Marinette asked, earning a small, almost joking puff of air from the blonde.

"Look, I've gone soft, ok?"

"Yeah yeah, whatever," Marinette chuckled, any humor leaving her as Chloe's words sunk in. "She's on its trail. This isn't good."

"No, it's not. I was gonna tell you tomorrow, but…" Chloe's face heated up, causing Marinette to elbow her in feigned jest.

"Hey, no worries. I keep your secret, you keep mine. Consider us even."

"We'll never be even," Chloe sighed, rubbing her eyes. "Not after… _Antoni_. But I can try."

"Hey," Marinette drew her attention towards herself. "We're even. _Trust_ me. After everything that's happened…Chloe, you've probably saved my _life_. We're even. Believe me on this."

Chloe smiled with tight lips, wrapping her arm around Marinette's shoulders and leaning in to a side hug. "Ok."

* * *

The next school day, Marinette was so focused on Alya, she almost missed Ms. Evelyn's pointed looks at her. _Almost_. She noticed when the teacher was talking about the French Revolution, going on about the chaos as if she was almost pleased by it. She must have been a real history buff.

"Revolutionaries," another sharp look at Marinette, "come in all forms. The people — the lower class — were the revolutionaries. The poor, neglected, overlooked lower class. It goes to show that even the strongest resolve can be broken with enough force."

Something about the teacher's words made Marinette shiver, breaking their eye contact to look down at Alya. Her hair was a mess, and when she'd walked in, the bags under her eyes had almost looked like bruises. She must have been pulling all-nighters again. _Great_. Alya got extra reckless when she pulled all-nighters.

When class finished, Marinette went to talk to Alya, only to be stopped by Ms. Evelyn first.

"Marinette, could I have a word?"

Marinette looked desperately at Chloe, who followed her gaze back to Alya, nodding. She followed Alya out, leaving just Marinette and Ms. Evelyn in the classroom.

"Yes, of course. What is it?" Marinette set her bag down in her seat, leaning against the table her and Nino sat at.

"Well, I just wanted to check in on you, of course," Ms. Evelyn made her way over to the teen, offering her a gentle smile — one a rescuer would offer to a wounded animal. "I know you've hit a bit of a rough patch lately."

"I…" Marinette hesitated, looking longingly at her teacher. She wanted more than anything to tell her everything that was going on. She wanted to give in to the poison aching in her stomach, calling for chaos. "I'm ok," she swallowed acid, thick and sickly sweet.

"I see," Ms. Evelyn looked almost disappointed by the answer, though she relented and put a light hand on her shoulder. Immediately, Marinette felt the sickening urge to spill all of her secrets, biting the impulse back painfully. "You know you can tell me anything, right?"

Marinette opened and closed her mouth, the words nearly spilling a number of times before she finally regained her dwindling composure. "I know. There's just a lot going on."

The thing in her stomach hissed at her, causing a nauseous ache to form in her chest. Ms. Evelyn seemed to notice, her brows furrowing in concern as she took a few steps away from Marinette. "Is everything alright? Are you feeling ok?"

Before Marinette could answer, she dove for the garbage can and vomited, the black acid burning her shivering lips. Ms. Evelyn held back her hair, rubbing soothing circles into her back with ice cold hands. "There there, kiddo. You'll be ok."

It took the heroine several more minutes to get herself under control, the vomiting ceasing as quickly as it had begun as soon as her breath was stable once more. "Thank you," Marinette sighed, leaning back against Ms. Evelyn's desk as the teacher handed her a few tissues. Suddenly, realization tugged at her senses, her eyes darting to the trashcan full of black bile. Her gaze flew back up to Ms. Evelyn's, who was staring down at the basket in pure shock.

"Is that…the stuff all over the news?" Ms. Evelyn's tone was eerily calm.

"Y- yes," Marinette sobbed, dabbing the stinging bile from her lips. "It is. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry."

Ms. Evelyn looked down at her, a bloodcurdling smile settled on her blood-red lips. "Well then, you best get going, _Ladybug_."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all! What do you think?
> 
> First of all, thank you so so much for those of you who responded to my author's note - I know I may have overreacted to a few concerning comments, but it was really nice to hear how many of you have been enjoying the story :)
> 
> That being said, what do you think? Things are heating up rapidly, thus the title of the chapter, and they certainly don't slow down until the end! So get ready!
> 
> Until Saturday,
> 
> ~Ashtyn


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